elliot's daily thoughts

boxes/summer advices

i don't like being put in boxes

i would lie if i said i do never put in boxes because i do.

because its normal in our society and you grow up doing it.

i don't like that tho and i try to change but i can't help myself judging others

i know it's not alright and i know it's not okay.

but what are these boxes? in my opinion these boxes are a social construct that is made by straight white men in the 14th century.

and there are three boxes: men, women and weirdos.

i personally belong to the categories weirdos and i am proud of that.

i never felt like a white cis woman and i also never was. i am not bipoc but my family is. i have bipocs in my family and i have white ones.

i also never was cis but i used to identify as cis. not as a woman tho, but as cis. as a cis girl. and it wasn't bad. but it wasn't me.

and yes, biologically i am still a woman. i have to x chromosomes, a breast and all these things what make you a biological woman. and i wont change that. i probably wont start t and i probably wont get top surgery and i feel okay by thinking that and it doesn't make me less trans or genderfluid.

because i realised that this "box thinking" isn't just with straight-people, also queers do it.

you don't want to get top surgery? - not trans

you're dating a guy as a cis girl? - not bisexual

you've changed your lable more than once? - cant be really queer.

and that's so fucking sad, because the queers have always been put in an awful box and now we're doing the exact same? that's so fucking stupid and i hate people for doing it, but sometimes i cant help myself doing the same.

i judge people by their look, by their appearance. i put them in the "mentally ill" box if they have sh scars, i put them in the "probably trans" box if theyre wearing a binder, if they have coloured hair, i put them in the "probably gay" boy and so on. and i don't know why and i guess we can still learn it, if we try.

what is also very shocking to me, is thinking about how judgy i was back in 2016. i swear, if you were plus-sized, i'd think "sweets-junkie" and "fat", if you had coloured hair "emo" and if you were a boy, kissing a boy, i'd think "ew". and that makes me sad, because i've been taught to think like that. i haven't learned it on my own, normally a 6-years-old doesn't make their own thoughts on that.

yeah, and i hope if you are as judgy as i was back then, you'll learn too that its not okay.

maybe some advices for summer because some people forget it each year (including me)

please, please don't comment):

-scars

-cellulite

-excess/sagging skin

-rolls on the stomach

-stretch marks

-scars from self-harm

-dark armpits/inner thighs,

-vitiligo/other skin conditions

-acne

-eczema

-"have you gained/lost weight?"

-"are you pregnant?"

-sweating/sweat stains

-complexion/skin color

-varicose veins

-....

GENERAL: NOTHING THAT CANNOT BE CHANGED WITHIN 5 MINUTES WILL BE ADDRESSED

thank you.

*wonders if it's not weird that the beginning has nothing to do with the end*

*decides that they don't care.*

-elliot