Alicia Smith

4) Don't

Alicia submerged the rag in water, wiping the flood from Daryl's forehead. She turned, going to rinse it out but a hand shot up, grabbing her wrist.

"Alicia."

Slowly she turned, her heart pounding. She met his eyes, tears brimming in her own. "You need to sleep." She said, barely audible.

He didn't release her wrist, staring at her. She looked different. Healthier than the last time he saw her but different. The purple in her hair had faded and it was cut short, almost a bob that reached right below her shoulders.

A new scar ran from her ear to her jaw. Another one across her nose. A new tattoo sat on her neck, covered by some of her hair. Alicia Dixon would be the one to get a tattoo in the apocalypse.

"Why'd you leave?" He asked weakly, looking away from her.

She didn't answer, instead she was looking him over as well. His hair was longer, gray poking through. His beard was graying as well. He had a new scar too, going from his eyebrow to under his eye.

She let out a shaky breath, gently pulling her hand away from him. "I'll run you a bath."

She stepped away, walking into the bathroom and filling the tub with water. After a few minutes Daryl walked in, his shirt missing.

She stared at him. It had been so long since she had seen him it made her want to scream. She tore her eyes away, turning her back so he could undress.

"Talk to me." He whispered. She felt him place a hand on her shoulder.

"I can't." She choked out, trying and failing to hold back tears. "Get in the bath."

His hand lingered for a moment before he let out an audible sigh and moved away. She could hear him undoing his pants and stepping into the bathtub.

"You can turn around." He mumbled. She did hesitantly, making sure he was completely submerged in the water. "You have to talk to me eventually." She didn't answer, taking a sponge and washing his chest. "Darlin'-"

She grimaced, like the name physically pained her. It did. "Don't... don't call me that." She said.

He furrowed his eyebrows, watching as she avoided his gaze and his touch. "Look at me."

She shook her head, scooting back slightly. "If I look at you then I'll cry again." It surprised her that she said it, not expecting to be so vulnerable with him.

"Ali, why the hell are you in France?"

She laughed dryly. "I came to France to get as far away from you as I possibly could and here you are."

His expression was hurt, a mixture of anger and sadness. "Why did you want to get away from me?"

"God don't you get it?" She scoffed. "I had hurt you too badly and I couldn't live with myself! I was rotting away in that cell and you were a constant reminder of what I did."

"You didn't hurt me." He countered.

"Yes I did Da-" she cut herself off, refusing to say his name. If she said his name then it would all be real. She hasn't said it since she left. Not out loud anyway.

"You can't even say my fucking name." He mumbled, looking away.

"Don't do that." She pleaded with him. "Please don't."

He sighed, sitting up so she could wash his back. Her eyes trailed along the familiar scars. She was almost compelled to touch them, trace her fingers over them like she used to.

"One of the nuns said Miss. Smith would come and see me. I'm guessing she meant you." He turned his head slightly to look at her. "Why are you going by Smith again?"

"It's my name, isn't it?" She asked.

"No." He said, more harshly than he intended. "Your name is Dixon."

She sighed, pushing him back into the water gently. "I thought you had moved on."

"What?" He furrowed his brows.

"Before I left Carol told me you were living with a woman." She said. "I'm I supposed to believe that was just a friendship?"

"Yes." He said bluntly. "Does it shock you that I had friends?" She didn't answer. "If you're so adamant that we're not married anymore, why is that ring still on your finger?"

She stopped her movements, glancing down at the ring that was in fact still on her finger. "Just never got around to taking it off." She mumbled.

"I love you." He said, grabbing her hand once again. "I love you, Alicia Dixon."

She closed her eyes tightly, praying that when she opened them he would disappear. "No you don't."