Save Me | Aaron Hotchner x Female OC

Chapter 4 - Memories

TW in this chapter for mention of child SA 

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Elena

Sunday morning brought with it beautiful sunshine and a good mood. I showered and got dressed in one of my many sun dresses, my plan for the day being to put the finishing touches on my new apartment.

My eye flitted around my living room. Almost everything was done... everything but one box. One damn box that had been screaming for my attention for not just the five years I'd had it since my uncle passed, but for most of the 16 years it had been since my parents passed.

In the first year after they'd died, I'd gone through the box filled with our memories and photographs religiously, desperate to cling on to what I had left of my mom and dad. But as time went on, and I had to live with Uncle Tyler, my life drained of anything that resembled happiness, and to look back on the joy I once had became far too painful.

I gritted my teeth and opened the box. My body screamed at me to just close the lid, but I couldn't. I was determined to get through it, to face the daunting task and remind myself that this box was meant to be about joy. It was meant to be about the moments in my life that did contain happiness. Despite it all, I didn't want my whole childhood to be tainted with only the bad memories.

Because it wasn't all bad, not really. I had good memories with my mom and dad before they passed away, and I'd had good friends until Uncle Tyler moved us away just before I started high school...I had good things from my childhood, I really did. This box contained snippets of those good memories, ones I wanted to keep, but ones that were just too heart-breaking to remember.

Tears welled in my eyes as I came across the photo of my parents I treasured so much. It was taken a year before I was born. They were standing underneath an old tree, my dad's arm around my mom's shoulder, looking at her lovingly, as if she was the only person around. My mom was looking directly in to the camera; her green eyes twinkling and her face adorned with her beautiful smile that everyone said mine was so similar too.

"You've got such a pretty smile, just like your mother," Uncle Tyler mused as he stroked my arm. "You know she used to love me before your father, don't you?"

I nodded. Uncle Tyler had told me lots of times about how he and my mother used to date in college, before she met his brother – my dad.

"Well your mom chose your dad," he continued as his hands began to trace over my shoulders and breasts as they always did, "and as she's no longer here, I think it's up to you to make it up to me, don't you?"

I inhaled sharply, dragging myself out of the darkest parts of my mind. I shut the box harshly and stood up. My heartbeat thundered in my ears as I felt the panic climbing in my chest.

It's okay, I reassured myself. He's gone. He can't hurt you anymore. No one can.

I closed my eyes and tried to focus on my breathing. In through the nose, out through the mouth.

It wasn't working. Why wasn't it working? I opened my eyes and looked around my apartment. It felt small, like the walls were slowing creeping towards me and threatening to entomb me within them. I needed to get out of there.

I slid on my shoes and stumbled to my door, all the while trying to regain control of my erratic breathing. Fresh air, that was all I needed.

I made my way to the elevator, despite my aversion to them, knowing I wouldn't be able to make it down all of the stairs, and because nothing seemed to be going my way, it still wasn't fixed.