The Badlings

Chapter 18. The Lunatic Knight

Characters in stories travel in arcs. That doesn't mean they get blasted from cannons, flying—Wheee!—through the sky and dropping into dung. No. That means they go through arcs of growth and arrive at some kind of an enlightened wisdom, which in turn is supposed to change them for the better (or for the worse, depending on the book).

Peacock was coming to a turning point of such an arc.

He sat up, blinking.

Painfully vivid sky stretched overhead. Not a cloud in it, not a bird. Patches of brown grass ran up a plateau where a dozen windmills stood like ancient giants. Their blades rotated lazily, creaking and swishing, as if they were gossiping about the unlucky new badlings that had dropped on their page.

"What is this place?" said Peacock.

"Does it matter?" Rusty dusted himself off. "How are we supposed to save Bells now?"

Grand was studying the landscape. "We've been here before...I think."

Rusty looked at him. "Where, on this page?"

"Um. Maybe it's a different page, or maybe it's a different part of it, but I have a feeling it's the same story..." He paused. "It's definitely the same terrain—Bells would know. See that hill? I think we were on the other side of it when we met Dapple, the donkey. And this side has the windmills..." His face cleared. "I think we're in Don Quixote. I'm sure we are. It looks just like in the book."

"Did you read it?" asked Peacock.

Grand's cheeks reddened. "Sort of."

"Don—what did you call it?"

"Don Quixote. It's the name of a knight. He lived in Spain, in the seventeenth century, I think."

"A knight?" asked Peacock nervously. "A real knight in full armor? With a lance?"

"He only thinks he's a real knight. He's crazy," clarified Grand happily. "He goes on these quests to revive chivalry—his idea of chivalry, anyway, which is attacking everyone he meets. I think if he's a badling like us, he might be even worse, crazy from having to act crazy."

Peacock and Rusty shared a look of utter horror.

Grand failed to notice it. "I'll tell you what happens in the book," he continued. "In the book he thinks he's being romantic and noble, because he wants to win the heart of this lady, I think her name is Dulcinea, so he fights people for her. If he sees us he'll probably attack us."

Peacock gulped. "Sounds like he belongs in a nuthouse."

"Can he help us fight Dracula?" asked Rusty hopefully.

"He has a lance," mused Grand, "but he's weird. I suppose we could try convincing him, but even if he agrees, how will we get back to Dracula?"

"They must have their ways for getting around," said Rusty. "They made it to Blackey, right? And to that Prince Prospero guy. Maybe there's another caterpillar hole somewhere. We could go look for it?"

"Or we could trick him," said Peacock.

"Trick him?"

The boys regarded Peacock with interest.

"You said he wants to win the heart of some lady?"

"Yes," confirmed Grand. "Lady Dulcinea."

"And you said he's crazy."

"That's what the book says."

"Then how about we tell him that Dulcinea is in danger? That Dracula holds her hostage or something?"