Love || Tom Kaulitz

3 heartbeats

"And I love you. Though I shouldn't. I do. I've loved you and only you through everything" I spoke softly.

————————

~ 8 months later ~

Ashley's POV

I giggled as Tom picked me up and placed me on the counter. I smiled before smashing my lips against his. I pulled away just smiling at him. His perfect features.

"Stop" he blushed.

I began laughing and lightly punched his arm. Since we escaped everything has changed. I wasn't living in constant fear anymore. Yes, he did lose his shit every once and a while, but he never hit me.

Together we made our way back to the top of the food chain. The most feared couple in Tokyo until we found out the news, that forced us to leave our lifestyle behind. 

~ Flashback ~ 4 months ago~

Toms POV

I held Ash's hand as she lay in the hospital bed. My heart ached in fear of losing her.

My head spun to the door as the doctor walked in. I could tell by his body language what he was about to say wasn't what I wanted to hear.

"Evening Mr Kaulitz," he said placing his clipboard down.

"Is she okay?" I asked. That's all I wanted to know.

"She's okay but-" he started.

"But-" I cut him off before looking back at her.

"We need to take her back in for an ultrasound. Our first test came out unclear" he spoke.

"Okay?" I said softly before he turned around.

"The nurse will come in soon" he said before shutting the door.

I watched the door shut before turning back to Ash, confused.

...

The nurse turned to me as she held the object on her tummy. She smiled before pointing at the monitor.

"You see" she smiled.

My heart slightly ached as I looked at the screen.

"There's two?" my voice croaked before I looked at Ashley as she laid quietly staring at the screen in disbelief.

I watched as tears slowly fell down Ashely's cheek. I looked back to the nurse whose smile quickly faded.

"Hold on," she said softly as she moved the monitor away from our view.

"What's wrong?" I asked the nurse as she tried to fake a smile.

"I-" she started.

"What's wrong" I repeated in fear.

"There's only 1 heartbeat," she said softly. "Let me get the doctor" she hurried out of the room.

I watched as she scurried out before turning to Ashley who silently cried.

"Hey, what's wrong" I said standing up and holding her hand.

"We can't have a kid, kids," she looked away.

"Why, of course, we can?" I smiled holding her cheek.

"Our lifestyle" she sniffled.

"We can leave this place" I shrugged.

"It's not that simple" she squeezed her eyes shut.

"It is. All of it, everything. We leave it all behind" I smiled leaning down and leaving a soft kiss on her forehead.

"But-" she started.

"I will do anything to keep you and these babies safe, I promise you" I tilted my head.

Ashley looked at me tears still streaming down her cheeks as she forced a smile. I hoped she knew I was going to try because I loved her.

It felt strange at first how much I loved her, but I understood now.

She wasn't the usual type, I would go for, but she caught my eye so intensely that she took my breath away. It was so captivating how different she was. She stood out.

I understood she was the only woman that could change me. Change me for the better.

She had fixed me. Even after those years, I put her through she stayed and helped put me back together. She fixed me while she was still broken.

...

The doctor placed the machine down with a sigh before taking his glasses off. He stood up straight before taking a step forward.

"So, from my understanding, you weren't aware of your pregnancy?" he asked.

"No" she whispered.

"Your fall was very harsh, combined with the alcohol. Unfortunately, you have miscarried a-" he continued looking down.

I looked to Ashley as tears began to stream down her cheeks once again, not caring what the doctor had to say. I looked back to the doctor anger rising in my body.

"Fortunately, the second one has survived. He is doing well" he smiled. I snapped my head at his words before looking at Ashley.

"He?" I whispered to her before looking at the doctor.

"The gender is a male. Sorry for spoiling it" he said. "You need to take it easy, no more drinking, or falling okay?" he said reinformed us.

I turned to Ashley as she slowly looked down at her stomach. I knew it was hard for her and it was going to be hard for the both of us.

"Once again I am very sorry" the doctor spoke before leaving the room.

...

Ashley slowly calmed down as I sat by her. My head was scattered.

"Why didn't you learn from the first time," she said softly looking out the window. I laughed lightly.

"It takes two" I giggled.

"No" she cried. "I've lost 2" she barely got out. "I'm not fit to be a mother".

I took her into my arms shaking my head.

"It's not your fault baby," I said softly into her ear.

~ End of flashback ~

Ashley's POV

After finding out that we were expecting a baby boy. Together we moved to Germany.

Bill, Bree, Gustav, Laura, Georg, and his girlfriend followed too.

Everything has been perfect. He's perfect.

I'm now less than 9 weeks from my due date and I couldn't ask for anything more.

I had the perfect fiancé.

And the most caring friends and family.

I always wonder.

What life would have been like without him

If we had never met

If we never collided in this lifetime

Or learned what the curve of each other's face,

Lips, and body

felt like

Who would I be if I didn't have you

Who would I have been if I had never been loved by you.