The Stars in Your Skin

CHAPTER 19

A.N.
Hello all! I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Neteyam going on the raid is a bit au in this chapter. Onward!

His struggle with a decision ends on his first raid.  He checks Tsawke’s saddle giving him a fond pat when the ikran warbles at him. “Are you ready for this?” Ha’ew asks ambling over.

His tail twitches and his veins prickle with insects crawling through them. “Ready as I’ll ever be.” This raid was one of many his people had run in efforts to thwart the Sky People any way they could. “You?”

His friend gives a feral smile. “Definitely.”

“First raid?” Ca’itey, a warrior a six years their senior asks as he approaches. The usually serious warrior’s demeanor is uncharacteristically buoyant.

“Yeah,” Neteyam answers truthfully.

“You’re unusually cheerful,” Ha’ew observes, “and it’s weird.”

The older warrior only laughs. Actually laughs. “Today I’m finally going to make my feelings for Tsunin known.”

It was no secret among the warrior’s circle that Ca’itey had it bad for the beautiful gatherer, but had danced around telling her for years.  “Finally.” Ha’ew exclaims.

“That’s great Ca’itey.”

“Why now?” Ha’ew asks curiously.

He shrugs.  “Things are too uncertain for me to hold back.” The words strike Neteyam deeper than an arrow to the gut.

He turns, ignoring the stare Ha’ew leveled on him, and goes to make sure Tsawke’s saddle is tight enough.  He fiddles with the strap, Ca’itey’s words stuck in his mind. He pushes them down. For now. He needs to focus for this raid.

The raid is chaotic. There’s explosions and gunfire and the air is too hot. The triumphant whoop of his fellow warriors sound through the air once they take the steel monstrosity down and begin raiding the machine. He warns his father when he spots the Sky People's war machines in the distance. In a flurry of activity they’re in the air headed toward High Camp, running high on a successful raid.

Residual exhilaration tunnels through his system, but stops cold when he looks to Ha’ew. Ca’itey sits slumped over in front of Ha’ew his side covered in blood. He’s still breathing but barely.

By the time they make it to High Camp, Ca’itey is already gone.

He sits just outside their marui sharpening his knife. The image of Ca’itey’s lifeless eyes keeps reemerging in his mind. He frowns. The warrior had been so excited to finally confess his feelings but had been cut down before he ever had the chance. Whatever life they could've had together was no more. He had waited too long.  What about him?

His ears swivel when he hears his father nearing the entrance.  Light spills from the inside when the screen is drawn aside.  He doesn’t look up, just keeps running the knife over the whetstone. His father drops down next to him.

He waits a beat before: “today was eventful.”

He nods.

“You okay son?”

He doesn’t answer. 

“Want to talk about it?”

He stops in his motions, clenching the handle. He calms down before putting his feelings into words.  “It’s just… he was so happy before the raid. Now, he’s gone.”

His father’s entire demeanor changes, turning sorrowful. “I’m sorry you had to see that today.” He clears his throat. “It was my hope–” He clears his throat again, “It was my hope you wouldn't have to see these things in your lifetime.”

“Yeah,” is all he manages. He makes a small sound when his father draws him into a side hug.

He lays in bed that night, his mind flying faster than a motivated ikran.  His mind drifts to Naawri and how his feelings deepen every time he’s with her. He thinks of her smile, her laugh, the way her fingertips are usually a different color every day. He thinks of her kindness, her passion for what she loves, how she let him be himself, and how despite all the loss she’s experienced she still smiles.  His heartbeat quickens  and warm fuzzy things flood his heart.

She made him happy by just existing.

His mind throws reality to the fore. He’s already promised to someone and his parents expected him to mate her. But he doesn’t want her for he knows their union would be a loveless one. She was chosen for him and his father announced it to The People. Mating with Sateya was expected by his parents and  his tribe. But the thought of spending his life with her felt like a noose tightening around his neck.

He wants to be with Naawri, but the thought of disobeying his parents fills his veins with ice. He turns over on his back, staring at the ceiling. What was he supposed to do?

Now, you must choose for yourself. Will you follow your heart or your duty as the Olo’eyktan’s son? His grandmother’s voice, wise and strong, ripples through his mind.

I’m waiting on a skxawng to make his move, Ha’ew’s voice playful and blithe says.

Can you for once consider doing something just for yourself? Kiri’s pleading tone rings  through his mind.

Things are too uncertain for me to hold back, came Ca’itey’s excited voice. Then his dead eyes staring up at him from the stone ground of High Camp surfaces with startling clarity.

Would he allow his fear of following his own heart keep him from happiness? Wait, what if she didn’t feel the same way? He bolts upright. He hadn’t thought of that. Eywa how could he not? What if she rejected him? He runs a hand through his braids. Her rejection would shatter his heart into a thousand shards. Could he bear that?

What if she does feel the same way? His mind supplies.

The cacophony of voices and thoughts halt. Was he willing to hold back out of fear of rejection? He thinks of Ca’itey and how he and Tsunin never got the chance to be together. Was Naawri worth the risk? Was she worth the messiness that would follow if the outcome was positive?  He searches himself, thinking of how she was never far from his thoughts. Yes. She was more than worth the risk. He smiles wide. He knew what he was going to do now.

Neteyam sleeps more peaceful than he had in a long time.

A.N.
See you in the next one! (^_^)