Take Me As I Am (Completed)

Chapter Forty

 Dedication to EmDirectioner :)

Chapter Forty

The heavy, obviously tense, atmosphere that surrounded the entire house freaked me out. Every girl was so serious around me, each one wearing a somber face as they pondered about what they would do if they got voted off. Even Trinity, despite the fact she had won a boyfriend in the whole experience, was nervously nibbling on her pointer finger's nail. It had basically become a stump in the past hour. 

We were all ((Ahem, they were all) anticipating what was going to happen when the boys walked back from their 'meeting' in the farther room. They'd been gone for twenty minutes already and with every second that ticked by, the room grew tenser. 

I, on the other hand, was having a grand old conversation with a cameraman. Remember Cole? Yup. He chuckled at the joke I told him, the Susan one, and leaned against a railing. "You could charm the pants off of a skunk."

"I'm not entirely sure if that's a compliment or not. So I'm going to pretend it is. Thanks! Means a lot!" With a cheery (Quite fake) grin, I gave a cheesy thumb's up. 

"You sure are a character," Cole shook his head with a fond smile. "You're not at all nervous about the impending votes?"

"Not really. If I stay, I'll just have to deal with another week of the same things I've been dealing with for the past month. and a half. If I get to go home, I'll be home! I'll finally get to go back to the life I've been missing for the past month and a half. Either way, it doesn't really matter." I shrugged, indifferent to everything around me. "Why aren't you in there? Filming? As I remember, that was your job…"

"They don't need that many cameramen. That's why Joe and I get to parol out here. The camera's rolling - getting shots of the nervous girls over there." Cole nodded his head towards the other guy, who was much older and greying. He gave me a quick nod and a smile before zooming in on the other girls.

"Yeah, I guess they're all pretty entertaining, huh?" I said while watching the girls all standing around. "Sometimes I wonder if events hadn't happened in my past… If I would be on this show and if I would be like them. You know, freaking out and having a heart attack over them noticing my existence. Would I have made it past the first week? Probably not. Would everything work out better, would I be happier? Would everyone else be happier?"

"You are who you are, Al. And yeah, something might have changed you… Most people do have that happen in their life. Because do you honestly think I'd be the same if my brother hadn't died? Probably not: that helped shaped me. Doesn't mean it's any less of who I am, it just means that it pushed me down the road I am now.Same with you, hon. In life, you can't please everyone -that's one of the main rules of life. Why focus on what you can't change and focus on what you can? I don't mean changing your life so everything is the way others want it, I mean letting yourself become who you're meant to be." Cole gave me advice and for the first time, I didn't run away from someone trying to help me.

"Thanks, Cole-"

"Girls! Get into line, the boys will be coming back any moment now." Miranda called out.