chapter 16

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Max Verstappen (POV):
My eyes flutter open after what felt like good sleep. I rub the sleepiness out of my eyes, and then startle.

A presence is in bed with me, and I have my hand over their waist.

What the fuck, I think, brushing their chocolate curls away from their face. And then I see Natalia sleeping peacefully.

Smiling, I go back to laying next to her. Last night floods back to me, pouring over data, spending hours on perfecting laps, Natalia watching me, not wanting to sleep alone, and then her actually sleeping next to me.

Truth is, I didn't want her to leave. I didn't want to not sleep alone because of nightmares. No, I didn't want to sleep alone because I couldn't spend another night full of cold loneliness.

When you spend every moment of your entire life always being told that you were alone in this world, unlovable, cold, and hated for winning, loneliness follows closely. It clings onto my very being, carving a hole in my heart that will never be filled.

I hate it more than anything, so I took the chance to not feel it. At least for one night. And I don't regret it.

Natalia blinks awake, smiling at me like she's the one who's grateful she slept here, not the other way around.

"Good morning, Lia," I say, like it's the most natural thing in the world.

"Good morning, Max," she whispers. "Sleep well?"

"Yes, you?" She nods. "You helped me. A lot. Thanks," I say after some silence. Once again, she  was like my guardian angel, pulling me out of my head and comforting me. And also like the angel she is, she kissed me. I can't forget the feel of her lips, even through my blinding panic and how quickly she let go.

I want to feel her lips again, I realize.

My face flushes slightly.

"Of course. I'll try to help you as much as possible, whenever you need it." And God does my heart burst at that. I never knew how much I truly needed to hear that someone would help me. "I'll always be here for you."

And that pulls at my heart strings, keeping me alive. "Stop saying things like that," I whisper.

"Why?"

"Because every word that comes out of your mouth hits my heart. It makes me feel things, Lia."

Her lips part, cheeks tinted pink. "Really?"

I nod, unable to look away from the soft pink of her lips. "Please," I beg, my heart way ahead than my head. "Kiss me. Make me feel at peace again, please."

She's surprised by my boldness, and honestly so am I, but I don't care. I don't know when this happened, but I suddenly need her more than ever. Maybe it's the way she never judges me and always helps, maybe it's that new fucking lip combo I noticed a few weeks ago, or maybe it's the way she ate my food even though her own head was fighting her, just to make me feel better.

"Kiss me," I repeat, bringing myself closer.

"Yes," she says breathlessly. Natalia leans closer, and then her lips connect with mine. It's like mine were made for her, the way we melded together like we were made for each other.

She released a quiet gasp when I traced her bottom lip with my tongue. I soak in every moment this time, loving the way she holds my face in her palms, running my hands through her hair.

Just as it started, Natalia pulled back quickly, hair rumple, cheeks pink, lips swollen. "Oh my God," she whispers to herself, and I'm honestly scared.

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