𝐕𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 |𝟏𝟖+|

Chapter forty-eight

Pollie Ashford's POV

Winter used to be one of my favourite seasons.

Nowadays I just see it for what it is. Cold, bleak and depressing. Bit like my life.

Today was the 18th December, exactly two weeks since I got shot, and two weeks since I'd last heard his voice.

I came back home to North Carolina two days ago, though it's hard to pretend like my actual home isn't in the heart of someone who doesn't even want to see me anymore.

We were each other's homes, but I guess that was only half true in the end.

Zero and Miguel were supportive of my decision, though I think we all wished that I didn't have to make it.

They said they were here for me, to call them any time I needed them, and whilst they told me they'd keep me updated, I did something that shocked me, and told them to stop.

I couldn't keep getting my hopes up only for them to be blown to smithereens every single day. It was, no - it has and continues to dent my mental health, pushing me into a dark state of depression that I've never experienced before.

If he wanted to contact me, he would've done so by now. And if I was going to move on in any way possible, I couldn't keep hanging onto hopes that didn't exist.

"Hey lil bro. Mind if I come sit?" I peered inside my brother's half open door, trying my hardest to push my emotions aside and simply appreciate the family that does want me around.

Micah froze, pausing his video game and looking from me to his best friend that he had over. "Err, yeah. Of course."

Micah jumped up and swiped a load of clutter off his bed to make space for me. When I walked in and sat down, he stared at me in awe and whispered. "You ok P?"

Different emotions resurfaced - love of another sort. "Come here." I pulled him down my his gangly body so that he was bent down hugging me. "I'm ok mikey. I'm sorry I'm not much fun right now, I'll try and be better."

Micah squeezed me, his own way of reassuring me that he understood without embarrassing himself in front of his friend.

I wiped my water line and clapped my hands together. "Right. What're we playing?"

Micah grinned as his friend Benson looked at me. "You're stunning."

Micah clipped his friend round the back of his head, making me laugh for the first time since what happened, happened.

"And you Benson, are still too young for me."

Benson shrugged, returning to gawp at the tv screen. They started playing again, throwing comments my way every now and then whilst I laid back simply listening to them have fun.

But then Benson spoke again, only this time it had me sitting up.

"Micah says your boyfriend dumped you."

I let out a sour laugh as my brother pushed his friend, a poor attempt to get him to shut up.

"Micah told you correct."