Flames of Ashes

Chapter Nine. First Year.

"Bravery is knowing the risks and facing them; foolishness is ignoring the risks and charging ahead."~Athika.

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My stomach was churning, my eyes wanted to claw themselves out and my heart was on the verge of fighting with my intestines on which one comes out of me through my mouth first.

Ashes surrounded me, bodies burned beyond recognition lay upon one another yet the fire was relentless knowing someone remained, someone still lurked. However, the only thing that mattered to me was the body I knelt beside.

I was safe and help was well on the way, but I had lost everything.
"Arthur-" I choked on my tears. His charred skin clung to skeletal bones and even with his eyes sunken deep into the sockets, his blue eyes still shone somehow, and I never left them hoping it would calm me as I inhaled the smoke.

His lips burnt away, and patches of raw skin were visible through the cracks and fissures. He was no longer white, but red and black. Then his hair, blonde hair always neat was non-existent.

"Arthur, do not leave me! I forbid you to leave me!" He was the bravest person I knew because against all odds, a faint pulse persisted, and his heartbeat was stubborn, unwilling to give out even when he was wheezing, painfully.

I wanted the pain to go away, but if he closed his eyes... he had to live, no matter the pain, he had to be fine. I shut my eyes. He couldn't just leave me here to handle the mess he created.

"Xarian, my love" He called out, his hand, a shadow of bones and sizzling reached out to me. His voice wasn't a whisper, just an echo of force.

"I'm here. Arthur, I'm here. Ssshhh. Don't speak, save your strength." I held his hand close to my chest.
"I'm so-"
"Don't." I clenched my jaw, tears still rolling down my cheeks. "If you truly are sorry, survive." My voice came out harsher than it should. Only my heartbeat and his could be heard. The fire was silent, but it couldn't reach us, we were outside the Wyn House.

He had pushed me out the door, I ran and turned around to realize that he had stayed behind. I had to burn down the door to reach him but this was what he had become for his bravery, while the gods turned deaf to my pleas. He had to survive.

His eyes held remorse, I could feel it. I could always feel him. His hand on my chest found the necklace he gave me.
"Fyrthar!"  He said. Burn.

"Arthur! Arthur! Arthur! YOU CANNOT DIE! YOU CANNOT LEAVE ME!" I held his body, shaking him violently. He wouldn't dare. What about all the promises that we would be together?
"Arthur!"

I jolted awake, sitting up with my heartbeat pounding in my ears. I glanced at Alexis, to see my episode didn't wake her up. Good.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
Sleep hadn't come to me in years. Except during the Knight test which proved that exhaustion and being severely injured outweighed my nightmares.

No matter how much I tossed and turned, my eyes refused to see anything else but the dead bodies. Arthur and Maze's dead bodies. Drake must have been reduced to ashes.

There was a sharp knock on doors and Alexis stirred, still sleeping. I wondered what she dreamt of. Did she see herself being a knight on the battlefield, while I was stuck in a loop of that one day? She was lucky.

The knock sounded again and I rose and wandered to the door. We only had about 3 to 4 hours so if it was Tamsin or Benjen I would burn them and-

"Koral!" I exclaimed. Her lips, like the blush of dawn, had a small smile. My heart was still beating fast.
She gave a nod, and said, "Hello, sister." I returned the nod. Years of etiquette training were still embedded in her after staying in this place.