𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘦𝘸𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘉𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩

Chapter Five | February 13th

They won't last, I thought. I kept repeating it in my head. It sounds mean and cruel, but i just couldn't believe that the boy that i love was in love with someone else.

A month passed, Jonathan and Katherine's family came over for dinner. I don't remember a thing but just sitting on Kailey's bed. "There's something i want to tell you guys" Jonathan spoke up. God no. Please don't say it. If he says it then it's true, it's confirmed. I don't like confirmation, i don't want to know anything. I think i blocked out what he said. My head just started playing all the memories that we've created these years, like if we built it. It was our sand castle, and it now it felt like it was being kicked and stomped on. Every time they would hang out at our house, we would always be in our room laying on our twin beds watching a movie. Katherine and Kailey would share a bed, me and Jonathan would share one. I always felt so aware of how close he was. I tried to keep as much space as possible, i didn't want to make him uncomfortable even though i wanted him to hold me. He would always hug one of my pillows that i put on my bed just to make it look pretty. Every time they went home and i got ready for bed, id take the pillow off my bed to lay down. It smelled like him. I don't want to sound like a creep but it felt like a hug. Maybe he couldn't hug or hold me when we're together but this pillow was enough for me. His scent was like cologne, but it smelled like him. You know how everyone just has their own scent? Yeah this was his. We would always share the bed, i don't remember a time where we switched. "I can't wait for you guys to meet her" he said with a smile on his face, showing us photos of his new girl, Kiara. I snapped out of the memory lane i was going down. My heart was still underwater.

I could feel him drifting away. He wouldn't make any plans to see us. Whenever we tried to make them, he'd say he was busy. Me and Kailey grew tired of always asking to see him. Whenever we did hang out with him, it'd be at their house. Their new house. They had moved away from the house we grew up in. Now they were 30 minutes away. It felt like he was never there. He was there physically and i could see him, but his mind and heart wasn't with us. It's like he was always thinking of something else, someone. I ignored it because i was just glad that he was spending time with us. It didn't last for long, he'd invite Kiara, always. All the time we went with him somewhere, she'd have to come too.

One time, he wanted to talk with us. All of us. That includes Kiara. We stepped outside and sat down. There were fairy lights hanging above us. The air was humid and you can hear the crickets. What he said was that Kiara is now apart of his life, and that things were going to be different. He had said that we were his best friends. He turned around to face Kiara "And you." he smiled and laughed like he was in disbelief, as if he was dating the most beautiful girl on the planet. " You're the love of my life" he smiled. I don't want to use the word cringe, but it's exactly how i can describe it. Yes, i was a bit hurt that his words were towards Kiara and not me. Me and Kailey still talk about that night, we make fun of what he said every now and then , well more like the way he said. But deep down i know that i wish and would've loved if he said it to me.

My family never really like Kiara. There was something off about her. I had noticed it the first day we met. She was..fake. Like plastic, i don't know how no else could tell. One time when Katherine was sleeping over at our house, it was late at night, we were all cuddled up ready to fall asleep. The conversation just started, it was as if she just started pouring everything out right into our laps out of no where. Kailey took the opportunity to ask her is she liked Kiara. Katherine likes everyone, she's an angel, she's sweet and funny. Very caring, maybe a little too much, it's going to get her hurt. If she doesn't like someone you know that that's on you, you know that the person she dislikes is not a good person. "Yea i do like her, she's very nice and very good for isaac." she told us, she said some other things. Kailey asked "Is there anything you don't like about her?" Oh god. Please, there has to be something. It was dark but i could that Katherine had a thinking face on. "She's a lot like her dad, she gets jealous very easily" she said. I've only met her dad a few times, let me tell you i did not like him. He's very sarcastic and very passive aggressive i guess you could say. Jealous? Kiara is jealous? Jealousy comes from insecurity, i think everyone knows that. It's a very ugly thing in my opinion. We fell asleep after our little conversation. Thinking that maybe it won't end well after all.

One day, we had made plans with Jonathan and Katherine to go to the move theater. We planned to watch spider man. It was raining. Jonathan dropped us off at the front while we went to go find a parking spot. We got in and sat in our seats waiting. Jonathan was walking towards his seat. No.No.No. Don't sit next to me. I won't be able to concentrate. Jonathan sat next to me. I was cautious of every little movement i made. He was so close. It was suffocating, in a good way. Not looking at him was the most difficult thing to do. Once the movie ended, we headed out back to the car. Our conversations had changed so much. It felt like we were getting to know a stranger instead of laughing and talking about the most stupidest things with your best friend. Our conversations would just be filled with, how are you? how's life? Then there would be a deadly silence. Like an awkward silence. Awkward was something we'd never had. I don't want to point fingers here, but Jonathan is at fault. He'd never bother to take the time and see and make plans with us. He drove us to my house and dropped us off. Yeah, dropped us off. He had somewhere else to be. He couldn't even spend the rest of the day with us. Disappointed had filled my heart. Us three decided to order takeout and watch a movie. Without him.