In Memoriam ✓

Chapter Thirteen: Dusk Til Dawn

Mallory

I stayed at Nick's apartment during the week after Reid's accident. Nick knew I didn't want to be alone, so we were always together. Even if we didn't talk, the nights culminated in movie marathons on his couch. It got a little awkward sometimes, but we settled into a routine. I was still adjusting to Nick's importance in my life because we weren't friends before the crash. But through Reid's accident, we found each other.

One morning, I was assembling a stack of pancakes at the counter when Nick entered the kitchen. His expression was serious and sad, and I immediately assumed the worst. Nick was going to tell me that Reid's memories were gone. He was never coming back.

"Mallory, you have to breathe." Suddenly Nick was everywhere around me, rubbing my back lightly and wrapping me in his arms. I didn't even notice that my breathing was erratic, my heart rate spiked. I felt a light sheen of sweat break on my face, my throat closing up. Tears filmed my eyes.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. I sat clumsily down on a stool, clutching Nick like he was my safety net. I felt light as a feather, about to give way at any moment.

I closed my eyes, breathing in and out. I was fine. I was safe. Nick withdrew from me once I'd calmed down, his eyes wary as he assessed me. 

"Nina just called me. Reid was discharged from the hospital yesterday. He's living with Tony at his parents' house." Nick told me softly.

My heart plummeted. I couldn't ignore Reid's presence anymore. He was at his old home, living in the room where we'd shared kisses as seventeen-year-olds, and our expectations for the future. If I closed my eyes, I could still recall the layout of his old bedroom.

"I said that I wouldn't doubt you, but I need a reason to trust you. Please tell me who you're avoiding, by staying here." Nick said. His tone made it clear that this was a request, not an order.

I exhaled, rubbing my palms lightly on my thighs to dispel some of my anxiety. "Just the idea of seeing Reid again makes my stomach turn over. I keep on trying to picture the worst situation that could happen, and then I remember that it already happened. Reid's so far away from me now that I can't reach him anymore."

"But you have to keep trying to reach him. Not for anyone but yourself." Nick said encouragingly. He put his hands on my shoulders, making me look into his eyes. I could see the compassion in them, the sincere meaning in his words. Nick never said anything he didn't mean. He was telling me to hold on. To keep on believing in my relationship, even when my personal conviction was waning.

I slowly nodded. "Thanks for taking care of me. I know I've been a mopey, unbearable mess, but I promise I'm going to get back up."

His eyes were dark and sombre as he looked into my own. "For the record, you weren't unbearable, or mopey, or even a mess. It's normal to feel devastated in a situation like this. I know you'll get back up, Mallory." Nick said with an oddly wistful smile. "You always do. I'm here if you need me."

I smiled tearfully. "I'm here for you, too."

After breakfast, which was pleasant with Nick there to cheer me up, I decided to gather my courage and visit Reid. Enough was enough; time was getting the better of us. I needed to make the first move, because Reid was too vulnerable to try to bridge the gap between us himself.

I drove to Jada's house. I steeled myself before knocking on the front door. The wood was familiar as my own front door's. 

Jada answered the door, blinking in surprise once she recognised me. "Mallory, dear. Have you come to talk to Reid?"

"Yes." Even I was shocked by the determination in my voice.

Jada lowered her voice. "I'm saying this in your best interest, but are you sure this isn't too soon? He was discharged from the hospital only two days ago. Give yourself some time, honey."