The Ones We Lose ⏐ The Walking Dead

04. Michelle

The group quickly made their way through the city. Most of the walkers that kept them trapped in the department store seemed to have grown bored and moved on to look for other sources of human flesh. They dispatched the few stragglers quickly and made their way to the roof. As they climbed the countless stairs, Mich cursed her decision to come back here. She cursed Alex for asking her to do this and she cursed her stupid conscience for agreeing.

When they came back to camp, she hoped that Merle died quickly on that roof. Even though she never offered him any kindness, she thought it unnecessarily cruel to wish him to die in pain. But now that she realized that Dixon was too stubborn to die on his own, she wished she killed him herself. At least then they wouldn't have to be here now, risking their lives.

After a while, they reached the top of the staircase. Mich looked at the unbroken chain on the door, only confirming that no walkers got to Merle this way. T-Dog rushed forward and snapped the padlock with Dale's bolt cutter. Daryl rushed through the door, pushing everyone out of his way.

"Merle!" they rushed after him as he called out for his brother. They stopped on the other side of the roof where Mich expected to see Merle still handcuffed to one of the pipes. Instead, Mich looked in horror at the severed hand lying on the ground. "No! No! No!" Daryl screamed as his face contorted in pain, his eyes filling with tears. Finally, Mich managed to tear her eyes from the gruesome scene, shifting her focus to the younger Dixon, watching him carefully as her fingers tightened around her knife.

Daryl soon ceased pacing, stopping right next to the small pool of blood gathered on the ground. He let out a few shaky breaths and shook his head softly. Mich stepped forward a little, retaining her grip on her knife. A few seconds passed in silence before Daryl quickly raised his crossbow, pointing it straight at T-Dog's face.

Michelle snapped into action, closing the distance between her and Daryl, her knife raised ready to strike. On the other side of him, Rick raised his revolver up to Dixon's head. He cocked the gun in warning, successfully stopping Daryl in his tracks.

"I won't hesitate. I don't care if every walker in the city hears it," Daryl's hand twitched slightly before he lowered his crossbow and hung his head. The pain in his face was clear. Mich felt a sting in her chest watching his reaction. She felt for him, his care for his brother. No matter what kind of person he was, Daryl loved his brother, even if Merle didn't deserve it.

"You got a do-rag or something?" Daryl asked T-Dog as Rick holstered his gun. The two men stared at each other for a moment, tension still clear in their interaction. Michelle stepped in, handing Daryl a piece of cloth from her pocket. "I guess the saw blade was too dull for the handcuffs," he bent down and grabbed the hand carefully before wrapping it up with the cloth.

Mich watched as Daryl put the severed hand into Glenn's backpack. Dixon's face was no longer readable. The emotion was gone completely, a stoic mask standing in its place. Michelle noticed how rarely Daryl showed real emotion before the group, the only thing he didn't seem to keep to himself was anger.

The rage that he would display to push people away, to remain the aggressive brute that most of the group saw him as. He used it as a shield and a weapon to protect himself from others and from himself. Mich noticed his act slip whenever Merle was away. Daryl would engage with the group and seemed to genuinely care, but it would all be gone as soon as Merle was near.

The group gathered themselves before Daryl took the lead following a trail of blood. It led them to the second staircase on the roof. They continued down the stairs onto one of the lower floors. Everyone was on guard, weapons raised, ready to attack. They were ready to push away any danger on the way, whether it would be a herd of walkers or Merle Dixon himself. No one would admit it out loud but they all knew that even in his regular state Merle posed a real threat to them all.