Love Games

Twenty - one: Choices

I lean against the counter and look at Emma, who is still sipping her coffee, lost in her own world.

Her eyes are distant, as if she's thinking deeply about something, maybe even saving the world in her mind, while my own mind is in chaos.

It's strange how two people can be in the same room and yet feel worlds apart in their thoughts and emotions.

Would I betray my ex?

Even though he threw me out on the street overnight, abandoning me like a stray cat, I don't know if I'm the kind of person who could do such a thing.

The memory of that night still haunts me.

The cold, the uncertainty, the sheer desperation of not knowing where I was going or what I was going to do.

But even with all that pain, I still can't bring myself to become someone I'm not.

I have always lived honestly and righteously.

I've always been honest with everyone.

In the sense that I have never done anything wrong, I have never cheated and I have never looked at other men when I was in a relationship.

My principles have always been my guiding light, even when the world seemed to be falling apart around me.

"Sarah." I stare at her in silence. My name hangs in the air between us, heavy with unspoken words.

I shudder, feeling a shiver run down my spine.

"Yes," I say, my voice barely above a whisper as I slowly walk towards her and sit down in the chair next to her.

"What if you came to work with me for a while?" Emma asks, always looking for solutions.

I told you before that I'm not really up for it, that I don't see myself ever working as a waitress.

But when you don't have a job, when you don't have a roof over your head - thank you, Emma, for letting me stay with you - and when you're desperate, you take what you can get.

Her words hang in the air, mixing with the aroma of coffee and the faint sounds of the city outside.

I think of the countless nights I've tossed and turned, the fear of the unknown gnawing at my soul.

"I don't know... I can't imagine... what if I don't make it?" I reply, my voice shaking with a mixture of fear and desperation.

The thought of failing, of not being able to support myself, terrifies me.

"No one is born knowing how to do everything. We'll teach you, we'll help you," she says. 

Her eyes are filled with hope and determination, a stark contrast to the uncertainty I feel inside.

Sometimes one door closes for another to open.

Her words echo in my head and I can't help but wonder if this could be the opportunity I need to start afresh.

The idea of working as a waitress isn't exactly what I had in mind, but maybe it's a stepping stone to something bigger.

I take a deep breath, look into Emma's eyes and nod. "All right," I say, my voice steadying. "I'll give it a go."

She smiles, a warmth spreading across her face. "We'll get through this together," she assures me, and for the first time in what feels like forever, I start to believe that maybe, just maybe, things will get better.

"I know, you've saved me so many times, I can't thank you enough," I say, standing up and pulling her into my arms.

It's a heartfelt hug, one that I hope conveys all the gratitude and love I feel for her. Emma has been my rock, my anchor in the storm. But as I hug her, I can't help but feel a pang of guilt.