Love Games

Twenty - nine: Loneliness, fear and late dinner

When I get to the guest room, I feel exhausted, as if every moment spent with Jack has drained me of every last drop of energy.

I go in and shut the door behind me, as if I wanted to put all my questions, all my fears, behind me.

But I knew they would find me.

When the silence enveloped me and I was alone with my thoughts, the feeling of doubt would overtake me again.

Why didn't he tell me everything? What is he hiding?

I sat down on the bed, the feeling of emptiness sinking into my bones.

All I wanted was a moment of clarity, a moment of truth, but instead I am left with more questions.

Every cell in my body reminds me that there must be something more, something beneath the surface, something I have not been able to see.

Perhaps it was a mistake to let it go without asking more questions.

Perhaps I should have persisted, sought answers before the doubt took hold of me again.

But now it is too late.

I am left alone with my thoughts, in this big house that now feels even stranger and colder. And in the silence of this guest room, I slowly realise that I have to face what is to come, all the truths and lies that still await me on the road.

I feel a cold breath of doubt lingering in the room, as if warning me that I still don't know the whole story.

And now that Jack is gone, I am left alone to find out what is true and what is not.

There is a knock at the door. The hour is late and the cold night envelops me with a weight that presses down on my mind.

My heart began to beat faster, as if it wanted to escape from my chest.

The dark silence of the room suddenly seemed to be intertwined with an unknown threat that paralysed me.

The fear that had been lurking in the background suddenly came to the surface and gripped me.

I feel as if everything has suddenly become dangerous, as if I have entered a world that is not my own.

"Sarah," I hear a woman's voice on the other side of the door. A voice that is somehow familiar, but at the same time strange, as if it were connected to memories that elude my consciousness.

My heart stops, then starts to beat even faster. I recognise the outline of this voice, but I cannot quite place it. Who is it? Why is it so familiar, yet so far away?

I freeze. What am I going to do?

My mind is racing like a wild river.

Would I hide under a blanket, like a child who believes that cloth can stop all the evil in the world?

Would I lock the door and ignore the voice, hoping the nightmare would go away? Or would it just stand there, paralysed with fear, unable to take a step?

When did I become afraid?

When did I become so fragile?

It all started when I first heard those bangs, those flashes of lightning that changed everything in an instant.

When I saw death so close I could feel its cold breath on my skin. From that moment on, my world changed.

I feel trapped in a mafia novel with no way out, spinning in a circle with no end.

And yet, somewhere deep down, I still have hope that everything will work out in the end, that I will find a way out of this abyss.

"Sarah," the voice rings out again, louder this time, as if calling to me from the depths of my own mind. I recognise it better now, but I am still filled with doubt.