i was thoroughly disappointed. before i opened my eyes and my vision was blurry and my hearing was still faltered, i was so hopeful that i was in the afterlife. but faster than i expected, my eyesight unfortunately adjusted to the bright fluorescent lights, all the sounds of the loud machines finally synced up, and my first attempt at suicide didn't pass with flying colors. i wasn't ready to know that i would have to live again. it hurt. knowing that i made it. that i had to be miserable and keep trying. i was a lost soul. i didn't exactly have the motivation to keep on trying. but i guess i had to. i had to try for my friend. but other than that, i had no other reason to try. but, it was so disappointing. i wish i just went away. people would be so much happier.
