Under His Touch - JJK

Chapter 18

Jungkook

"You know, not answering is also an answer." Kian continues when I don't say anything. This boy always knew a way to find out what he wants to know.

"Isn't it obvious already? The word like doesn't even come close to how I feel about her." I answer honestly. There's nothing to hide from him anymore, he already knows and sees through me. Telling him what he already knows is not going to change anything.

"I've seen the way she looks at you. She wants to be with you, right?"

I shut my eyes, inhale deeply, and give a little nod in response to his question. "She doesn't know what she wants. She's still young to make such a big decision for her life, especially with me."

"Why's that? Because you are too old for her?"

"Isn't that enough? People will gossip, make her life a nightmare, and then she'll end up regretting it all. I really don't want to mess up her life."

I've heard and seen a lot of stories. I don't want to be labeled as one of those guys who are always chasing after younger women. I can't take that risk. The press could destroy my reputation and my career. I know I can stop that, but not forever. She might forget about it eventually, but I won't.

"Can't say it won't happen." Kian answers with a frown. "It's complicated man. She is Blake's daughter."

Kian and Rhys grew up with Blake just as much as me. They were younger, but they were always around. And Blake cared about them just as much as me. When my father decided we should move to Miami, we kept in touch and our friendship never died. Luckily, our jobs allowed us to catch up more often than we thought we would.

I don't use social media, and neither does Blake. You won't come across much about us online, just our names mentioned in some boring work-related articles. Not many people pay attention to that kind of content on the internet. If we were more active online, I might have had a chance to see what Blake's daughter looks like. And maybe I wouldn't be in the position I am right now.

"Did you two...?"

He doesn't need to finish his question, and he sure doesn't need my words to know the answer.

"Can't blame you" he continues. "The temptation must be hard to resist as long as she lives under your nose."

To be honest, hearing those words out loud makes me feel disgusted by myself. I should've known better, should've acted better. Now everything is firing back.

It's a good thing she is not here tonight actually. Maybe we need some space from one another, see if it helps both of us realise what we really want.

"Kian..." He rises his head. "Would you mind staying here with Rhys for a couple of days?"

He looks at me in confusion. "You going somewhere?"

"Kinda." I answer as I think about this. "I should keep a little distance from Y/N, but I need you to stay here with her."

"Okay, I'll stay. I'm sure Rhys is not going to have a problem with it." 

He didn't. The next morning, they both decided to stay at my place, so I grabbed a bag and headed to one of my apartments that I hadn't rented out. It's a small apartment, but it feels so fucking empty. When I left, Y/N still hadn't come back.

I'm staying away from her.

I know that physical distance is not going to change my mind or my feelings for her, but what if she starts to question herself about all of this? What if she starts to think that I was merely a fleeting presence in her life, someone who was here for a moment but not meant to last?