Reunited Paths: A Father's Journey (Harvey Specter ff)

I'll Love You Forever

The morning of the funeral was somber and quiet. The air was filled with a mix of grief and fond memories. The family gathered early, helping each other get ready. Harvey had invited Marcus and his parents to stay in a nearby hotel to make the preparations easier. Marcus and his parents met him at the condo, everyone talking amongst themselves while Harvey worked to gather everything that he needed. 

As the service time approached, they made their way to the cemetery. The memorial was set to take place in the little building across the street.  The venue had been decorated with lilies, Nina's picture displayed a few feet from the open casket. Soft music played in the background.  adding a sense of depth to the already sad atmosphere.

As the service began, the sad music faded out slowly come to a stop and silence fell over the room. Harvey walked up to the podium, he had papers in his hands but he was sure he didn't need them. He cleared his throat and began to speak,  "She was the love of my life," he started, his voice cracking with emotion. "I remember the first time I saw her; she had this incredible smile that lit up the room. I didn't know what to do with myself so I stupidly kept bringing her iced tea. I didn't even know if she iced tea. She didn't. But we shared so many beautiful moments together, and even though we had our ups and downs, my love for her never wavered. She was my rock and my confidante, I love you Nina."

From the audience, Mike muttered under his breath, "No, you don't." Harvey had heard it from the stage but to avoid making a scene he kept going. At Harvey's words, Mike grew angry. How could Harvey say things like he loved her? He didn't. He had bailed on them. He had left when Mike was six and never explained why.

Despite his anger, Mike felt a pang of curiosity. He had always wondered about his father's reasons, and maybe, just maybe, this moment held the answers he had been seeking. As Harvey continued speaking, Mike's mind raced with conflicting emotions—anger, curiosity, and a glimmer of hope.

Finally, unable to contain himself any longer, Mike stood up and interrupted Harvey's speech. "Stop lying!" he shouted, his voice trembling with emotion. "You don't get to stand there and pretend you cared. You left us! You left me! You didn't love her, you don't get to say that!" The room fell silent, all eyes turning to Mike as he faced Harvey, his anger and pain laid bare for everyone to see.

He paused, looking at Mike as tears began pooling in his eyes. Harvey took a deep breath before continuing, "Mike listen — I know you're angry and know I made mistakes—mistakes that hurt her and you deeply. I left when I should have stayed. I was scared, confused, and I thought leaving was the best thing for all of us." He let out a shaky sigh before continuing "but I was wrong. I miss her every single day. I miss the way she laughed, the way she cared for you, and the way she loved with all her heart. If I could turn back time, I would do everything differently. I would be the man she needed me to be."

He was too emotionally out of it, he doesn't remember the next few moments. He saw Marcus walk over to Mike in an attempt to calm the kid down. Someone had brought Mike a bottle of water to stop the tears that had been flowing. Mike was surrounded by his family and friends, each of them offering comfort to the twelve year old boy who just lost his mom.

Meanwhile, Harvey sat at the edge of the stage deep in thought, he was subconsciously kicking his legs. He's sure he looked like a little kid but his thoughts distracted him from what was happening around him.

He didn't know the kid felt that way about him. Maybe it would be better if he let the kid live with Marcus. He knew it wasn't with Nina wanted but his brother had kids of his own. Mike would probably like living with Marcus, a lot more than living with him. Wasn't all this about supporting Mike and doing what was best for him? Marcus would be a much a better dad than Harvey would be anyways. Harvey wasn't sure he even deserved the title of dad.

Harvey sighed deeply, feeling the weight of his failures pressing down on him. He had tried to do right by Mike, but maybe his presence only made things worse. Marcus had always been the stable one, the responsible one. He could give Mike the family environment he needed, one filled with love and understanding.

He looked up from his thoughts, his eyes immediately found Mike's. Everyone around him had dissipated further into the crowd taking condolences and talking to everyone.

Harvey hopped off the stage and made his way to Mike. He sat down on the chair next to him, not saying a word. Mike, who was oblivious to the fact that Harvey joined him, was engulfed in embarrassment and deep in thought.

Hot tears began to flow from Mike's eyes as he understood the gravity of what he just did. He just embarrassed his mom at her own funeral. Everyone would talk about it, how the Ross kid didn't learn manners. He should have just kept his mouth shut but he had been so angry at Harvey. How could he stand up there talking about his mom like that. Sure she had been a force of nature but Harvey had decided to leave. He didn't get the rights to say he loved her, not after abandoning them.

Mike sulked in the chair, his chest heaved with sobs as he struggled to regain his composure. The room was still, the weight of his outburst hanging in the air. He wished he could take it back, but the words had already been said.

Harvey placed a hand on Mike's shoulder taking him out of his thoughts. Harvey's voice a gentle whisper as he began speaking. "Mike — I know you're angry and upset. and it's okay to be. Losing your mom is difficult and it's hard going through grief. But Mike. take a look around." Harvey gestured to the people in the room, the friends and family who had taken the time to drive out here. Mike wiped his eyes and followed Harvey's gesture looking around.

Harvey continued, "They know your pain, they all loved her too. Just like we did." Harvey wasn't sure if he supposed to say anything but he nudged the water bottle forward and Mike took a few sips to calm himself down.

In that moment, Mike realized that despite his outburst, he wasn't alone. They all shared his grief and his love for his mom.

After the service, everyone slowly migrated to the gravesite for the final farewell. Harvey had picked a serene spot, chosen for its beauty and peacefulness. The moment he saw it, he knew that this where she wanted to be buried.

Harvey stood next to his son, his hand around his shoulder, letting Mike know that Harvey was right here. They both watched as the casket was lowered. There was a collective moment of silence until the Nina was in her final resting place. People hugged, cried, and comforted each other, finding solace in the shared grief and the memories they would carry forward.

Some people lingered afterwards to speak to Harvey but majority of the crowd had left.

Harvey had told Marcus that he would meet them back at the condo, he wanted a few moments alone with Nina. Mike had left with Marcus and his parents to go back to the condo and change out his suit into more comfortable clothes.

Harvey had taken a small trip out to his car, he grabbed a few things before walking back to her resting place. He sat down in the small patch of grass next to the freshly dug dirt. He had all these things in his mind that he was going to say. However, the second he sat down, his mind had been empty. He sat there for a little while before finally saying, "Hi Nina. I tried my best to give you the funeral that you wanted." He closed his eyes for a moment letting the tears that built in his eyes escape. "I should have talked to Mike before the ceremony. I'm sorry, I know I'm new to this whole dad thing. I wish you were still here."

He slowly pulled out a bouquet of lilies. "I brought you these, you thought I forgot didn't you." A soft smile escaped his lips, he looked at the ground as if addressing her, "i'll love you forever." He kissed his hand and rested it on the dirt. He got up slowly, his eyes on the handprint he left in the dirt.