Sin-bin

Chapter 38 - Marical

It's not easy getting back into the swing of things after your life is upended without your consent. 

By now, both the pictures of Dallas picking me up at the airport and of Dallas leaning on me in the box at the Yetis game have made their way around the internet. Most sources are neutral or positive about it form what I can tell or have been told. I've been told the internet thinks we're a cute couple. I shouldn't blush when I'm told that, but I can't help it. 

The game went better than I thought. For me, at least. I mean, we won, but I guess that's not what matters between Dallas and me. At first, I was so utterly uncomfortable by the number of people staring at us in the box. It was mostly WAGS and other friends and family, with a few scratches. Eventually, the GM of the Yetis stopped by and shook my hand before swiftly leaving. Dallas burst out laughing at my expression after I watched the GM waltz out. 

Eventually, most people got over us being up there and started to mind their own business. I guess it helped that they were preoccupied with cheering for whoever they were there for. I, too, started to forget about the people around us. I guess I got sucked into the game, paying more attention to shitty ref calls and wicked shots from my team that I was less preoccupied with other people. It also helped that Dallas never once left my side. Most of it he spent touching me in some way, either through holding hands, touching my thigh, or leaning against me. 

Not to mention how weirdly hot he looked in my jersey. I'd never fucked someone wearing my jersey before that night, but Dallas and I got on it when we got home. Staring at my name on the back while he called it was something different. 

Even though it all went well that night, it was rough getting ready for the next game I would be playing in. It didn't help that it was a road trip game, so I couldn't even have Dallas up in the box watching me. I couldn't hold him before or after like I wanted to. 

The plane ride was its usual chaotic mess. I roomed with Otto, who said jackshit about my recent scandals and didn't—to my utter relief—act bothered that he was sleeping in the same room as a man who is attracted to men. That was one of my fears about opening up about my sexuality. The practice and warm-up went smoothly, and my head was better than the last time I went to practice. I called Dallas before I took my nap and texted him when I woke up, to which he thankfully replied immediately. 

The game and afterward were what I feared. 

One night has been replaying in my mind for days. 

Last year, when I was already fucked up and teetering on the edge of an abyss, something happened that scared me, and it didn't happen to me. In a game, an opponent started to harass our then-goalie Logan Klicker, who had been open about his sexuality for a year or so. The opponent said slurs and practically spat at Logan, who stood frozen, unable to defend himself against a hate crime. Drunk and partly putting myself in the position of Logan, I had immediately reacted. It was the start of my reign of time in the sin bin. 

But the way nobody else on the ice did anything. The player got in no trouble, or even fucking apologized for fucking being a homophobic prick in public in a middle of a game. Like, what the fuck? And now all I can think about is how it's going to happen to me. How would I react? What would they say? What if they brought Dallas into it?What if it got physical? Would I cry? Would I be able to get on the ice again after that?

My mind swirled with possible situations and outcomes as we got ready to head back on the ice after warmups. I didn't even notice Cap until he purposely bumped into me.

"You good there, Bacques?" He raised his eyebrow at me, but I could tell he was genuinely concerned. 

I shook my head of my foggy thoughts and tried my very best to smile. "Yeah, I'm just a little caught up in my thoughts."