Me and my family are in Devon rn but we're going home in the morning (it's currently 12:05 am) anyway, I wrote this one a while ago but I tried with it so I'm gonna copy - paste it into here :3




Human?

Human
Yes human
That is what I am
Right?
Then why don't I feel like one?
Why does my flesh feel wrong?
Why do I feel ears and a tail that aren't there?
The word 'human' has never fit, I fear it never will
For I am merely an animal, trapped inside the husk of a person
A creature that does not belong here
I was ripped from my home and forced into a body that doesn't work properly
I am not from this plane, nor this time
I am a being with many lives, bodies, identities
I have yet to come to terms with the fact that no one will ever fully understand me
I will never truly feel comfortable in this body
I have had many lives and across all of them I have carried this burden
A burden of pain, and suffering, and hurt
Of betrayal, and abandonment
I may look human, but I am far from
I am a creature of beauty, and grace, and power that I have yet to access
I am an animal, wild, ferocious, feral, cunning
And yet, I continue to be calm, docile, domestic
I will never be fully human, I will never be completely comfortable in this skin, my tails will always be just good enough to help lessen the disdain I feel for this form
I will never stop yearning for the freedom of running, of flying
I look in the mirror and see a stranger staring back
An unfamiliar creature that walks on two legs, lacks most of its fur and has misplaced its ears and tail somehow
I may say that I'm a boy, but the truth is far more complex then that
I am a boy in the way a fluffy orange cat is a boy
I am a boy in the way an excitable German shepherd pup is a boy
I am a boy in the way a magpie is a boy
My name is Fuzz, but my name changes across lives, the sound used to refer to me changes throughout my time on this plane of existence
My pronouns are he/it/pup/cat/purr/feather
He because I am just a boy, nothing more
It because I am merely an animal with thumbs
Pup because I am one
Cat for the same reason
Purr as in the sound I make when finally comfortable in my own skin
Feather as in the extensions of my body that help me to soar high
My existence is painful, but there are things I do to make it more bearable
A lot of people don't like that, it doesn't make sense to me
How does my form of expressing myself affect them?
Others seem so bothered by my attempts at being happy
One day though
Maybe
I will find a lifetime where I can rid myself of this hurt and be happy without anyone objecting
That is the dream
Human..


I wrote that a few months ago, to clarify, my theriotypes are, undomesticated long haired orange cat, german shepherd pup (I remember being trained as a service pup), muntjac deer (m), veloceraptor and my kintype is a fluffy nightfury, all of these are past lives but some are both past and present (psychological and spiritual) I am also questioning magpie °v°


Fuzz, out :3

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