DISASTER GAYS: The Miraculous Adventures of Max and Sawyer (NAME PENDING)

Ch.6 - Prayer

"Max, pray for me?"

Max eyes Sawyer confusedly. "I thought you didn't want to be cured." Mumbling, he adds, "and maybe I don't really want it either, seeing as I'm still with you..."

"No, I don't mean any of that bullshit. I want an explanation," says Sawyer, clutching Max's arm, "on why your God hasn't helped the both of us. He's leaving us here to rot at the hands of RêverEnd."

"My God would never do such things. He gave me my memories back through prophetic dreams. He led me back to you. He's done enough favors for me already."

"Yes, because he's your God and not mine. He's ignoring me on purpose, so now I need you to vouch for your best friend."

"I... fine. Just... don't get upset if there's no response." Max takes a deep breath. "Dear Heavenly Father," he begins, twiddling his thumbs, trying to formulate the words for a proper prayer. "I am asking you to guide me towards the right path."

The stars give no response. The night grows colder and the sky feels emptier than before. As another gust of wind ruffles the silky grass, two small humans huddle beneath the frost-cloaked might of a deity.

"Thank you... for bringing me and Sawyer together again. Thank you for letting me have just a moment of happiness. I won't squander the little gifts you give me.

"My parents always said that you loved me the most. That you loved me more than they did, and I believed them for a little while. But now, I'm starting to doubt you. Forgive me for this, Father, but you can't just leave Sawyer to fend for himself. He may not have kneeled at your feet or memorized any of your teachings, but I still care about him. And I can name someone who has sinned a thousand times more than he has.

"Eli - he goes by RêverEnd now - he is the devil on Earth. He is also, unfortunately, someone who used to hold my hand at Mass.

"Right now, it... he... has done nothing but bring misery to humanity. He eats away at all of the good in this world, and I can only stand back and watch as the people I love are devoured.

"What have I done to deserve this? What has Sawyer done to deserve this? We..." Max pauses, glancing at Sawyer, "Sawyer is your subject, just as I am. And as your loyal follower, I would really appreciate it," he says, his voice trembling, "if you could show Sawyer some mercy. ...Like it or not, I love him almost as much as you do. Please answer my prayer, Lord. Your children are waiting. Amen." Lightly, Max nudges Sawyer's arm, looking at him expectantly.

"Amen," says Sawyer, quickly feeling hopeless. He had never planned to worship any sort of deity in his lifetime, much less follow the rules it constructed for him. Throughout his lifetime he'd built an image of opulence and desire around himself; he was skilled in the art of business and professionalism, had a voice that rang clearer than water running off an icicle, and never left the house without makeup and fashionable clothing. 

Others were quick to notice his potential, more than eager to point out that such an enigma was not only intelligent, but youthfully appealing. By the time he was nineteen, he'd lost count of how many partners he'd been with, romantically or sexually. Only when he had met Max did he realize that he'd always been vain and selfish; even then, Max had been a saint for giving two shits about him. His parents died during the war, still believing that they had raised a spoiled brat. Sawyer had never imagined that he could become a cowardly, backstabbing whore whose mind was barely functioning half of the time, but after believing that Max had died, he caved to RêverEnd rapidly without any resistance, blinded by heartache. If Max still believed Sawyer could enter the pearly gates when he died, then he was just as foolish and naive as when they'd first met.

"What are you doing, Max?" asks Sawyer as he watches his partner tussle with the band around his neck.

Max rips off his collar, throwing it to the dusty earth, and stomps on it. White sparks fly out from the device before it shuts down. He faces the open sky, ears arched. "See that?" He points to the useless leather band, now left for the earth to reclaim. "I refuse to be the servant of an immoral machine." He pulls in an unceremonious Sawyer, who squawks in surprise. "- AND I - LOVE - THIS - MAN!! DO YOU HEAR ME?!"

Sawyer doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. Max is a tiny ant in comparison to the universe, but looking at him waving his arms and yelling into the open air, Sawyer thinks he's never loved a person more than this.

He finds himself laughing. "Fuck, Max. I missed you so much. It's been so long since I've been happy."

He knows what it's like to be drained of happiness, the pulsating wires in his mouth and ears, the color leaving his face, the memories of goodness and pleasure becoming foggy and distorted. It had become nearly unimaginable to him that he could retain his own happiness without it being snatched away as soon as a shred of joy was conceived in thought.

Max pauses, putting a hand on Sawyer's shoulder. "I know, Soy. But no matter what happens, I will continue to make you as happy and comfortable as possible. You have my word."

Their arms never leave the safety of the other's body until they arrive at Sawyer's doorstep. Half-sober, stumbling to keep the same pace as the other, their mouths finally return the words and stories forgotten from the last five years. For two hours, they talk about their favorite novels that they swore they remembered reading at one point; about how carrots could be eaten raw, or cooked, but never undercooked; about how they were both lucky to have not caught diseases during the war; about how Max had gotten jealous during that period of time because Sawyer was smitten with Alejandro Perez. About cravings and midnight carnal fantasies; about true love, and everything they'd lost, and feeling ruined and worthless. 

And all the while Max kissed the tears off Sawyer's cheeks and told him that if something were to happen, Sawyer shouldn't cry so much, although he was crying as well. Nothing between them could last forever. They both knew it deep down, but they pretended that, if just for some time, what they had was eternal.