Ice Princess

44

"Why are you taking this all on yourself?" Bucky finally asked her as they finished their meals at a local diner.

"So much of my life has been out of my control. If I can control, even the smallest amount... besides, it's Demeter that has it out for me, not you all." Bucky reached across the table and squeezed her hand. "Demeter has the power to stop every plant from growing on Earth. Promise me, if it comes to that, you let me do what needs to be done."

"What do you mean by that?"

"An eternity of misery in exchange for all of earth living for who knows how many generations? Seems like a fair trade." She didn't look at him and took her hand back, putting it in her lap.

"It's not going to come to that."

"I asked Strange to look at the possibilities of what might happen... he says it's a 50/50 chance. It's the waiting that is really awful. Now with Strange restricting my access, it feels like I can't move fast enough and time is flowing through my fingers. As much as I like spending time with you, I really need to get back to Strange's to keep looking." She started to rise, not looking at him. Bucky did as well taking her arms.

"I can help."

"Most of the books are in dead languages. While I appreciate it...."

"Then I will at least walk you there and take you back to the compound."

"You don't have to...."

"But I want to." She nodded consent and he kissed the top of her head. It felt that Melinoe was holding something back, something he would not like. He just couldn't put his finger on it yet.

----

After spending the rest of the morning researching at Strange's, Bucky picked her up. She held onto the notebook she was using so hard, her knuckles turned white. He could tell Melinoe wasn't purposely ignoring him, she was deep in thought. But the silence was driving him insane.

"I said.... Do you want me to join you for lunch?" He had already repeated himself three times before being able to pull her out of her own thoughts.

"Huh, ok, I'm not that hungry."

"You still need to eat." Before they got up the stairs, Love was already running up to her with the kitten behind trying to keep up.

"Flurkins are so much fun. I made her eat my dad. Don't worry, it was only for a few minutes."

"What did I tell you about letting the kitten eat people?" Bucky asked her.

"Daddy wanted to see if he could get out on his own, without hurting her, of course." Love told them. Melinoe gave a weak smile and patted her head absentmindedly.

"I'm sure Flurry had a good time playing with you. You can watch her whenever I'm not home, ok?"

"Her name's Flurry!" Love shouted to let everyone know.

"I'll join you all in a couple minutes, I want to write to my dad." Bucky took Love to the kitchen.

Father,
I found a solution today, but it is impossible. It says I need to create life from death. I don't know how to do that. Do you? I will keep looking for other solutions.
Love,
Melinoe

The letter dissolved after she wrote its closing. She didn't know how long it would take for it to reach him. So far, no writings Strange had would fix her problem. She couldn't have children. She couldn't bring someone back from the dead. Melinoe went to the lab to work. She started to enter data into FRIDAY and was starting to get back results. Nothing for certain yet, but compared to previous data, this was rather concerning.

"I brought you a sandwich, you missed lunch." Bucky stated leaving her a plate.

"I'm not hungry." She continued crunching the data, a worried look on her face.

"You got to eat." He turned off the monitor. "I know you're worried...."

"If you had a chance to make sure billions of people were safe, would you do it?" She asked.

"Yeah, but..."

"Ok." She took the sandwich and took a bite out of it. "I'm just stuck in my head too much." What Bucky didn't know was the program she created kept running even with the computer turned off. "I've been ignoring you and I'm sorry. I appreciate everything you've done lately." Bucky eyed her curiously, something was going on and he didn't know what it was, more so than usual. Then again, she's had so much thrown at her in such a short time that anyone under this much change and stress would be a little off. "Can we go for a ride?"

"Of course. Where would you like to go?" He smiled down at her.

"Anywhere but here, at least for a bit."

On the bike, Melinoe pressed her check into his back. It wasn't cold, she just wanted to feel something from someone that wasn't a child. Bucky could feel a difference in how she sat behind him. Like she was trying to sap some of his strength away. Often he would ask if she was ok and would squeeze her hand, she'd say yes and would squeeze back. Other than that, she didn't speak to him until they stopped. Gulls were flying overhead and there was salt on the breeze. Melinoe slid off behind him and smoothed her clothes with her palms. When she saw where they were, she smiled.

"I know it is too cold to go in the water, but do you mind if we go sit on the beach?" She asked him.

"For you, anything." They walked down hand in hand, Melinoe sat down first and Bucky sat beside her.

"When I was a kid, I thought the ocean was something made up. I mean, I read about it, saw it on TV and in movies, books and magazines, I knew it existed, but it wasn't real. You know. It's like you know what a million dollars are, but you aren't really ever going to see it in front of you during your life time."

"Speak for yourself."

"You know what I mean. One of the first things I did when I left the orphanage was go to the beach. There were so many sights, sounds, smells, which looking around were apart of so many children's memories that they were making. I was insanely jealous, but at the same time, so happy that they were getting a chance to see something so ...."

"Big?"

"Wonderful. It wasn't just the ocean. It was families interacting with one another, the seagulls stealing food, the tide, the wind, sun, sand, everything. I just sat all day watching. Even with reapplying sunscreen every couple of hours, I think I must have been burnt badly enough that I should have gone to the hospital. But I didn't leave, I felt if I left I would have missed out on something." Melinoe leaned her head against Bucky and they watched the waves come and go for a bit longer. Reaching down, Bucky took her chin and lifted it up so she was looking at him.