I hate you I love you

Chapter 1: The Beginning of Everything

Are the people you know really who you think they are? This is a story about my life. My name is Zoey, and I am twenty-five years old. I have been an orphan since I was six years old. I still remember the day when I saw my mother for the last time, and the words she said to me that day have haunted me for a long time. One day, I finally understood what she meant—what it feels like to live in fear and have no one to lean on or trust. She said to me, "Never make the same mistake as me, and when the time comes when you have nowhere to go, choose for yourself and do the right thing. Remember," she said, "I love you, but you are better off without me. Be a good kid and listen to Nanny; she will be a better mother to you than I am."

Nanny was the only person my mother still trusted. She was an older woman, but she had a heart in the right place. She was neither rich nor poor; she always loved looking after the other children in the neighborhood where she lived, feeding them, and giving them a place to sleep. Furthermore, she was a good woman. Everyone who knew her called her Granny Nanny. When I look back, I am always grateful that Granny Nanny took me in and raised me as if I were her real daughter. Through her love, I learned to be thankful for the little things in life, always try my best to achieve my goals, help other people out when they are in need, and always be righteous. But still, I miss my real mother every day. She never told me why I couldn't stay with her; she never gave me an answer.

That last day, she pulled me close to her and hugged me tight, and she said, "I love you. I really love you. Always remember that." Her face, with tears as big as raindrops, was the last I saw of her. She walked to the car, got in, and drove off. I tried to run after her, called her name, and said, "Mommy, don't leave me alone; come back!" Well, I was crying, trying to run after her. At one point, I stopped, and by my exhausted legs, Nanny, who had followed me, hugged me tight and said, "Don't worry, Sweetheart, I'm staying with you. I know you're sad now, but if your mom had another choice, she would never leave you behind. She does this because she loves you and wants to give you a better life than she had. One day you will understand. Come with me, sweetheart; this is your home now, and you are more than welcome to live with me."

Nanny was the only person I had when my mother left, and I didn't know who my father was. My mother never said anything about him, and I always wondered if I even had a father. I hoped one day she would come back to tell me why she could not keep me, but sadly, I will never get an answer from her or ever see her again. Nanny, who is always honest with me, said that the same night I couldn't sleep because I missed my mother so much. Nanny came to me with a sad look on her face, and she said, "I'm so sorry I have to tell you this now, but you should hear it now than never get to hear it." She said, "I don't really know how to tell you this, but your mom is in a better place now." She hugged me tight and said, "Look out the window and see what you saw." The dark sky outside was full of stars that made the sky shine, and Nanny continued, "Your mother is now one of the stars that will always watch and follow you." Well, my eyes filled with tears. I understood what she meant. I couldn't speak a word. I let my tears fall while Nanny hugged me tight. Furthermore, I asked Nanny what happened, and she said with a sad voice that it was an accident, sweetheart. She died in a car accident. The weather just now was so bad; you just saw it in the rain and thunder. She lost control of the wheel, didn't see the stoplight, and collided with another car. No one else got hurt, but sadly, your mom wasn't okay. They still tried to save her life, but sadly, she was already gone. I asked Nanny with a sad voice, "Did she endure any pain?" Nanny reassured me, "She was gone right away. Don't worry, sweetheart, your mother is in a better place now, and you are in a better place. Stay with me, I will take care of you. Be a good child. Study hard and build a good future for yourself. That will make your mother proud." And that's the beginning of my life. I know it sounds like a sad beginning, but as I say, this is just the beginning. The beginning of everything.