Why can't I hate you ~Arshi FF

Epilogue 2: Salvation

These whole couple of weeks Raizada family was swept up in a whirlwind of emotions. They still can't believe that their favorite Damadji's ever-so-caring-good-mannered-lively-vibrant-personna was just a facade, that he was just using their trusting Anjali Bitiya for money and deceiving all of them. However, they were awestruck with her bravery and were doing everything to support her. Anjali's divorce was just getting finalized with Shyam and Arnav had done everything in his power to put him behind bars and keep him there for as long as possible.

He had been busy with the legal proceedings, taking care of his Di and handling his responsibilities as the CEO of his company that he barely had time to tend to his wife's needs. However, he was welcoming this distraction because deep down he knew he was not worthy of her forgiveness. He has not repented enough. His Khushi is just too forgiving and has a personality which cannot stand a conflict. Of course, she could not punish him, so he must punish himself. And he is deeming that punishment to be staying away from her, for he cannot yet trust himself to treat her the way she deserves.

Arnav ji is duniya k sabse acche pati hain [Arnavji is the best husband of this world], it hurts him to know that he was not and Khushi saying those words so believably hurts him even more. Oh, What has he done! How can he live with himself..

***

The whole ordeal was nibbling at Khushi's heart. She can't seem to shake off the feeling that all of this might have happened because of her. Why of all people Shyam had to meet her.

A young girl, full of innocence and generous love, did she ever think she would be in any way a cause of such a situation? Of course, the cause was that ugly Shyam's filthy self... but unwittingly she had become the instrument that would bring home this shattering truth... for his Di. The one person he considers his world "Di, aap hi meri duniya ho [Di, you are my world]", she remembers him vocalizing his feelings for Anjali on Rakhi. And now, yes she has become equally important to her. Because when you love someone truly, you know who they love with all their heart... and somewhere those others become part of your heart too. Anjali had always welcomed her, always supported her, and now Khushi's mere existence had hurt her irreversibly.

In this place, that she had started to consider as home, Khushi is now feeling like an intruder. Even though all the family members have been understanding towards the situation, they can't seem to emanate the same warmth towards her. And Arnavji too..had been feeling so distant from her. They have barely found a moment together, she hasn't seen him sleep in his bed for days and have felt his absence strongly in her core. Does he still blame me for everything too?

"Aur Arnavji... Kya wo theek hain? Itne dino se unhe kitna kuch sambhalna pada hoga. Theek se soye bhi nhi. Ek to ye laad governor kabhi apni dil ki baat kisi se nhi karte. Akdoo Singh Raizada jo thehre. Mujhe unse baat karni hi hogi." [And Arnavj..is he okay? He is going through so much on his own. He hasn't even been sleeping properly. It's just like him, to never express his feelings. Arrogant Singh Raizada!] She chided herself to only think about herself and not thinking of him sooner.

Above everything, she has decided to forgive him because.. she understands him. They are the same in this way, both will tolerate everything for the ones they love. And she knows all he did was because of his love for Di even when he was hurting the most. She knows how boundlessly selfless his love is even when his actions seem to be selfish, and now, he has told her he loves.. her.

***

She finds him at the poolside, gazing at the stars. He couldn't remain untouched of the sanka, his wife spreads around after all. 

She is behind him, feeling terrible, perhaps even feeling unwelcome around his lonely aura, but she has resolved to reach him, to know he is alright. She is worried though, if her presence would upset him, isn't that why he had been avoiding her? What would she even say now.. what words would be enough to soothe him, to fill the gaps his heart must be feeling inside for his Di. She feels a little guilty in her way we all know she mustn't... she has no idea how to make these terrible feelings go away. So she offers an embrace. She needs to take care of him... and she needs his strength to hold on to too.