It Ends With Us ✦ Kate Martin

Prologue

7 years ago...

2019
Autumn

"i just don't understand gay and lesbian! It's so fucking stupid" My dad drunkenly slams on the table, "and bob comes in with his stupid husband holding hands a shit it's disgusting!" He rolls his eyes as if look down at my mash potatoes that i've now separated on each side of my plate— too sick to my stomach to eat.

"it's just so—" my mother shakes her head as she puts a soft hand on top of my own, "we have nothing to worry about Stan— Addy will marry a fine man, won't you sweetie.." She smiles as i look up at my dad before the front door opening softly takes our attention away from the conversation i desperately wish i could disappear from.

"Kate what a surprise!" My mom smiles as my head snaps from the table to my now open door, "i didn't know you were coming by! I would have set a plate up for you.."

"yeah i didn't either" i smiled before looking towards my girlfriend in horror.

"what are you doing here? Let me grab you a plate!" my mom smiles before making her way to the kitchen before Kate stops her.

"don't trouble yourself Mrs. C— i'm just here to talk to addy really quick!"

"well okay! don't be shy hun, you know your welcome to take some!"

My parents knew Kate was gay without her having to verbally say it— at least my mom had to, she assumed by the way she carried herself, dressed. My mom was always a big believer that if you weren't a girly girl or you played sports— you were gay.

Hence why she never wanted me to ever play basketball like Kate, she believed it was an influence— a life style.

Not basketball.

Being gay.

I smiled towards my parents excusing myself from dinner as i pull Kate outside to the front porch.

"Kate what the fuck!"

"i-i know baby.. i just— i needed to see you before i left for school..." She grabbed my hand before i pulled it away quickly, the warmth of her palm still tingling through my fingers.

"We can't - i-i can't Kate..."

"You still haven't told your family about us?" she asked, and I could see her face completely drop.

"I will, ok? Just give me time," I pleaded.

"I've given you three years Addy," I watched her run her hands down her face in frustration, frustration that I was causing. She opened her mouth and then shut it back again, looking like she was trying to find words but couldn't.

"You don't get it Kate," I shook my head, my eyes avoiding her blue ones.

"Then fucking help me get it!" Kate's voice raised as she spoke to me, something that was such a rarity from her that it felt so foreign to hear.

"I won't ever make it out of this house if they found out i was gay.. let alone ever see you, your family, watch you play! How could you be so selfish !"

"Me? Selfish?" Kate laughed as my hand slapped over my lips regretting what came out of my mouth as soon as it did. "I held you for YEARS! Pretending to be someone i am not and is that fair to me? No, but i love you— and id go to hell snd back into the fucking closet and back for YOU!" Kate whisper/yelled, "and i asked you to do some simple thing for me!"

"Kate it's not that easy... i-i love you." I sob before she shakes her head letting out a soft sigh.

"it's not enough addy.." Kates head shakes before i grab her hand softly.

"y-you can't do this... p-please don't..."

"I have to Autumn.. i have to let you go... you're going to have to let me go.."

"K-kate please..."

"Keep singing okay," she grabs my face softly before kissing my forehead, "go live your dream and never stop being you... i love you, remember that,.."

"then why are you doing this?"

"because i can't sit and wait anymore baby..." She sighs, "i can't keep relieving these three years and not pretend like they don't hurt..." She drops my hand before walking down the stairs towards her car. "I'll always think of you — no matter where i am,."

I begin to sob uncontrollably without getting what i wanted to say out as she pulls away, i wanted to scream at her tell her i loved her, i wanted to chase after her and pull her into my arms one last time, but i couldn't...

I whip my face softly before turning back to go inside as my chest hurts from holding my tears in..

"Honey?" My mom says softly, "are you okay?"

"Yeah," I nodded, "I think I'm gonna head to my room."

"Ok baby," she smiled and placed a kiss on my forehead before I went straight to the stairs. All the crosses that adorned the walls and the bible scriptures felt like they were burning into my back.

Kate's words echoed through my ears as my eyes took in the verses about loving everyone. It was like a sick dream until I finally made it to my bedroom and I completely broke down against the door. It felt like my heart wasn't even inside my chest and that all the air had been taken out of my lungs because I couldn't tell my family that I'm in love with Kate Martin.

That was the day i promised myself i would forever love Kate Martin.

No matter where we were in the world.