Eclipsed Hearts

CHAPTER 5

An eye adjusted to mine,
My heart, I tell you is not fine,
Caught a glimpse of you,
Trying to hide the smile,
And in that way I fell in this rhyme
Eyes blushing, or Eyes judging?
I can't really decide,
For this heart of mine is not so fine
Laughing at me or smirking in glee,
Oh dear mind, when will I ever get free?

In a day I had created a bridge between us, a broken one, no matter how hard I tried to reach the other side, I shall either remain longing, or fall into the deep abyss of nothingness. I had never had the courage to confess for the only thing I feared was this very moment, where I'd hack and chop on the chain that brought us together.

This fogged memory from yesterday when my feelings had been exposed naked for the world to see, Chandra had passed this faint gaze towards me as if wanting me to decline the allegations, for me to revolt yet all I did was stare into her eyes, mine screaming in horror of the crime I had committed, I had her caged in my heart.

Wanting to let out, she tore my flesh, my heart bleeding from this wound. She wouldn't dare meet my eyes or talk, I heard a faint melody reach my ears, and hoped this to be a duet but she startled upon the sound of me opening my window, I wouldn't call this being startled, it was more like... A-voiding. Yes, she was avoiding me, and she didn't even put an effort to make it less obvious. Unfortunately, that was not the only time. It was dusky over my head, the sun was about to rest, I had come back from this evening walk and somehow had caught a glimpse of her watering the plants with her back towards me.

"Chandra, How are you?" I whispered loud enough for her ears to catch, she jumped at first to turn around but stopped mid way to find it was me and reverted with an "I am fine.", the excitement she inherited was gone, maybe walked a few many miles south, a long way back. I wished to engage more in the conversation but all I got was words drier than the Sahara itself. So I did the only thing that came to my mind, give her space. Maybe more than she needed.

I wouldn't open the window not even for the aesthetics of it, she wanted space, I'll give her space, on my way to school, where once we both went laughing, hand in hand. I sat on the school bench half an hour earlier than the rest, just for the sake of space, we both sat together on the front seat but today I had fancied myself the last corner one, it was the hottest seat, and with the humidity wanting to accompany the clouds it was unbearable for one to breathe.

Just like Chandra, I had started avoiding Tam as well, I pretend like they don't exist, or I made sure to the finest that I do not see them. Although living in the same house avoiding Tam was a heavy load, so I kept words to myself, unless it was really necessary like when my mother asked me to call Tam for supper, with a heavy heart I had to call for him.

The change was visible, I barely ate and my cheeks had decided to sink in, if this continued, I was soon to turn into a skeleton. Our bond was that of a mother and a son and to watch it break, was to see the end of a decade. Everyone saw this, the neighbors, my parents, our friends, everyone, but they wouldn't dare mention her name in front of me.

I had started to confide in myself, although I mostly did, but with Chandra gone I had no one to talk to, or I did, but prefered to rather keep this mouth shut, for the sake of my own better.

The rain was heavy, in the gloominess of my consciousness I had forgotten about her, absent mindedly, walking towards the window to look at the damage caused by the rain.

I did not meet her eyes, whilst looking into the shallow water I murmured an apology and slammed the gate, the gate that bonded our hearts, the window that played its part.

All I heard was her faint call "Suraj?".