Percy Jackson And The Lightning Thief

I Battle My Jerk Relative

A Coast Guard boat picked us up, but they were too busy to keep us for long, orto wonder how three kids in street clothes had got out into the middle of the bay.There was a disaster to mop up. Their radios were jammed with distress calls.They dropped us off at the Santa Monica pier with towels around ourshoulders and water bottles that said I'M A JUNIOR COAST GUARD! and spedoff to save more people.Our clothes were sopping wet, even mine. When the Coast Guard boat hadappeared, I'd silently prayed they wouldn't pick me out of the water and find meperfectly dry, which might've raised some eyebrows. So I'd willed myself to getsoaked. Sure enough, my usual waterproof magic had abandoned me. I was alsobarefoot, because I'd given my shoes to Grover. Better the Coast Guard wonderwhy one of us was barefoot than wonder why one of us had hooves.After reaching dry land, we stumbled down the beach, watching the city burnagainst a beautiful sunrise. I felt as if I'd just come back from the dead – which Ihad. My backpack was heavy with Zeus's master bolt. My heart was evenheavier from seeing my mother.'I don't believe it,' Annabeth said. 'We went all that way –''It was a trick,' I said. A strategy worthy of Athena.''Hey,'she warned.'You get it, don't you?'She dropped her eyes, her anger fading. 'Yeah. I get it.''Well, I don't!' Grover complained. 'Would somebody –''Percy...' Annabeth said. 'I'm sorry about your mother. I'm so sorry....'I pretended not to hear her. If I talked about my mother, I was going to startcrying like a little kid.'The prophecy was right,' I said. '"You shall go west and face the god whohas turned.' But it wasn't Hades. Hades didn't want war between the Big Three.Someone else pulled off the theft. Someone stole Zeus's master bolt, andHades's helmet, and framed me because I'm Poseidon's kid. Poseidon will getblamed by both sides. By sundown today, there will be a three-way war. And I'llhave caused it.'Grover shook his head, mystified. 'But who would be that sneaky? Whowould want war that bad?'I stopped in my tracks, looking down the beach. 'Gee, let me think.'There he was, waiting for us, in his black leather duster and his sunglasses, analuminum baseball bat propped on his shoulder. His motorcycle rumbled besidehim, its headlight turning the sand red.'Hey, kid,' Ares said, seeming genuinely pleased to see me. 'You weresupposed to die.''You tricked me,' I said. 'You stole the helmet and the master bolt.'Ares grinned. 'Well, now, I didn't steal them personally. Gods taking eachother's symbols of power – that's a big no-no. But you're not the only hero in theworld who can run errands.''Who did you use? Clarisse? She was there at the winter solstice.'The idea seemed to amuse him. 'Doesn't matter. The point is, kid, you'reimpeding the war effort. See, you've got to die in the Underworld. Then OldSeaweed will be mad at Hades for killing you. Corpse Breath will have Zeus'smaster bolt, so Zeus'll be mad at him. And Hades is still looking for this...'From his pocket he took out a ski cap – the kind bank robbers wear – andplaced it between the handlebars of his bike. Immediately, the cap transformedinto an elaborate bronze war helmet.'The helmet of darkness,' Grover gasped.'Exactly,' Ares said. 'Now where was I? Oh yeah, Hades will be mad at bothZeus and Poseidon, because he doesn't know who took this. Pretty soon, we gota nice little three-way slugfest going.''But they're your family!' Annabeth protested.Ares shrugged. 'Best kind of war. Always the bloodiest. Nothing likewatching your relatives fight, I always say.''You gave me the backpack in Denver,' I said. 'The master bolt was in therethe whole time.''Yes and no,' Ares said. 'It's probably too complicated for your little mortalbrain to follow, but the backpack is the master bolt's sheath, just morphed a bit.The bolt is connected to it, sort of like that sword you got, kid. It always returnsto your pocket, right?'I wasn't sure how Ares knew about that, but I guess a god of war had to makeit his business to know about weapons.'Anyway,' Ares continued, 'I tinkered with the magic a bit, so the bolt wouldonly return to the sheath once you reached the Underworld. You get close toHades... Bingo, you got mail. If you died along the way – no loss. I still had theweapon.''But why not just keep the master bolt for yourself?' I said. 'Why send it toHades?'Ares got a twitch in his jaw. For a moment, it was almost as if he werelistening to another voice, deep inside his head. 'Why didn't I... yeah... withthat kind of fire-power...'He held the trance for one second... two seconds...I exchanged nervous looks with Annabeth.Ares's face cleared. 'I didn't want the trouble. Better to have you caughtredhanded, holding the thing.''You're lying,' I said. 'Sending the bolt to the Underworld wasn't your idea,was it?''Of course it was!' Smoke drifted up from his sunglasses, as if they wereabout to catch fire.'You didn't order the theft,' I guessed. 'Someone else sent a hero to steal thetwo items. Then, when Zeus sent you to hunt him down, you caught the thief.But you didn't turn him over to Zeus. Something convinced you to let him go.You kept the items until another hero could come along and complete thedelivery. That thing in the pit is ordering you around.''I am the god of war! I take orders from no one! I don't have dreams!'I hesitated. 'Who said anything about dreams?'Ares looked agitated, but he tried to cover it with a smirk.'Let's get back to the problem at hand, kid. You're alive. I can't have youtaking that bolt to Olympus. You just might get those hardheaded idiots to listento you. So I've got to kill you. Nothing personal.'He snapped his fingers. The sand exploded at his feet and out charged a wildboar, even larger and uglier than the one whose head hung above the door ofcabin seven at Camp Half-Blood. The beast pawed the sand, glaring at me withbeady eyes as it lowered its razor-sharp tusks and waited for the command tokill.I stepped into the surf. 'Fight me yourself, Ares.'He laughed, but I heard a little edge to his laughter... an uneasiness. 'You'veonly got one talent, kid, running away. You ran from the Chimera. You ran fromthe Underworld. You don't have what it takes.''Scared?''In your adolescent dreams.' But his sunglasses were starting to melt from theheat of his eyes. 'No direct involvement. Sorry, kid. You're not at my level.'Annabeth said, 'Percy, run!'The giant boar charged.But I was done running from monsters. Or Hades, or Ares, or anybody.As the boar rushed me, I uncapped my pen and sidestepped. Riptide appearedin my hands. I slashed upward. The boar's severed right tusk fell at my feet,while the disoriented animal charged into the sea.I shouted, 'Wave!'Immediately, a wave surged up from nowhere and engulfed the boar, wrappingaround it like a blanket. The beast squealed once in terror. Then it was gone,swallowed by the sea.I turned back to Ares. 'Are you going to fight me now?' I asked. 'Or are yougoing to hide behind another pet pig?'Ares's face was purple with rage. 'Watch it, kid. I could turn you into –''A cockroach,' I said. 'Or a tapeworm. Yeah, I'm sure. That'd save you fromgetting your godly hide whipped, wouldn't it?'Flames danced along the top of his glasses. 'Oh, man, you are really asking tobe smashed into a grease spot.''If I lose, turn me into anything you want. Take the bolt. If I win, the helmetand the bolt are mine and you have to go away.'Ares sneered.He swung the baseball bat off his shoulder. 'How would you like to getsmashed: classic or modern?'I showed him my sword.'That's cool, dead boy,' he said. 'Classic it is.' The baseball bat changed into ahuge, two-handed sword. The hilt was a large silver skull with a ruby in itsmouth.'Percy,' Annabeth said. 'Don't do this. He's a god.''He's a coward,' I told her.She swallowed. 'Wear this, at least. For luck.'She took off her necklace, with her five years' worth of camp beads and thering from her father, and tied it around my neck.'Reconciliation,'she said. 'Athena and Poseidon together.'My face felt a little warm, but I managed a smile. 'Thanks.''And take this,' Grover said. He handed me a flattened tin can that he'dprobably been saving in his pocket for a thousand miles. 'The satyrs standbehind you.''Grover... I don't know what to say.'He patted me on the shoulder. I stuffed the tin can in my back pocket.'You all done saying goodbye?' Ares came towards me, his black leatherduster trailing behind him, his sword glinting like fire in the sunrise. 'I've beenfighting for eternity, kid. My strength is unlimited and I cannot die. What haveyou got?'A smaller ego, I thought, but I said nothing. I kept my feet in the surf, backinginto the water up to my ankles. I thought back to what Annabeth had said at theDenver diner, so long ago: Ares has strength. That's all he has. Even strength hasto how to wisdom sometimes.He cleaved downward at my head, but I wasn't there.My body thought for me. The water seemed to push me into the air and Icatapulted over him, slashing as I came down. But Ares was just as quick. Hetwisted, and the strike that should've caught him directly in the spine wasdeflected off the end of his sword hilt.He grinned. 'Not bad, not bad.'He slashed again and I was forced to jump onto dry land. I tried to sidestep, toget back to the water, but Ares seemed to know what I wanted. Heoutmanoeuvred me, pressing so hard I had to put all my concentration on notgetting sliced into pieces. I kept backing away from the surf. I couldn't find anyopenings to attack. His sword had a reach a metre longer than Anaklusmos.Get in close, Luke had told me once, back in our sword class. When you'vegot the shorter blade, get in close.I stepped inside with a thrust, but Ares was waiting for that. He knocked myblade out of my hands and kicked me in the chest. I went airborne – fifteen,maybe twenty metres. I would've broken my back if I hadn't crashed into thesoft sand of a dune.'Percy!' Annabeth yelled. 'Cops!'I was seeing double. My chest felt like it had just been hit with a batteringram, but I managed to get to my feet.I couldn't look away from Ares for fear he'd slice me in half, but out of thecorner of my eye I saw red lights flashing on the shoreline boulevard. Car doorswere slamming.'There, officer!'somebody yelled. 'See?'A gruff cop voice: 'Looks like that kid on TV... what the heck...''That guy's armed,' another cop said. 'Call for backup.'I rolled to one side as Ares's blade slashed the sand.I ran for my sword, scooped it up, and launched a swipe at Ares's face, only tofind my blade deflected again.Ares seemed to know exactly what I was going to do the moment before I didit.I stepped back towards the surf, forcing him to follow.'Admit it, kid,' Ares said. 'You got no hope. I'm just toying with you.'My senses were working overtime. I now understood what Annabeth had saidabout ADHD keeping you alive in battle. I was wide awake, noticing every littledetail.I could see where Ares was tensing. I could tell which way he would strike. Atthe same time, I was aware of Annabeth and Grover, ten metres to my left. I sawa second cop car pulling up, siren wailing. Spectators, people who had beenwandering the streets because of the earthquake, were starting to gather. Amongthe crowd, I thought I saw a few who were walking with the strange, trotting gaitof disguised satyrs. There were shimmering forms of spirits, too, as if the deadhad risen from Hades to watch the battle. I heard the flap of leathery wingscircling somewhere above.More sirens.I stepped further into the water, but Ares was fast. The tip of his blade rippedmy sleeve and grazed my forearm.A police voice on a megaphone said, 'Drop the guns! Set them on the ground.Now!'Guns?I looked at Ares's weapon, and it seemed to be flickering; sometimes it lookedlike a shotgun, sometimes a two-handed sword. I didn't know what the humanswere seeing in my hands, but I was pretty sure it wouldn't make them like me.Ares turned to glare at our spectators, which gave me a moment to breathe.There were five police cars now, and a line of officers crouching behind them,pistols trained on us.'This is a private matter!' Ares bellowed. 'Be gone!'He swept his hand, and a wall of red flame rolled across the patrol cars. Thepolice barely had time to dive for cover before their vehicles exploded. Thecrowd behind them scattered, screaming.Ares roared with laughter. 'Now, little hero. Let's add you to the barbecue.'He slashed. I deflected his blade. I got close enough to strike, tried to fake himout with a feint, but my blow was knocked aside. The waves were hitting me inthe back now. Ares was up to his thighs, wading in after me.I felt the rhythm of the sea, the waves growing larger as the tide rolled in, andsuddenly I had an idea. Little waves, I thought. And the water behind me seemedto recede. I was holding back the tide by force of will, but tension was building,like carbonation behind a cork.Ares came towards me, grinning confidently. I lowered my blade, as if I weretoo exhausted to go on. Wait for it, I told the sea. The pressure now was almostlifting me off my feet. Ares raised his sword. I released the tide and jumped,rocketing straight over Ares on a wave.A two-metre wall of water smashed him full in the face, leaving him cursingand sputtering with a mouth full of seaweed. I landed behind him with a splashand feinted towards his head, as I'd done before. He turned in time to raise hissword, but this time he was disoriented, he didn't anticipate the trick. I changeddirection, lunged to the side and stabbed Riptide straight down into the water,sending the point through the god's heel.The roar that followed made Hades's earthquake look like a minor event. Thevery sea was blasted back from Ares, leaving a wet circle of sand fifteen metreswide.Ichor, the golden blood of the gods, flowed from a gash in the war god's boot.The expression on his face was beyond hatred. It was pain, shock, completedisbelief that he'd been wounded.He limped towards me, muttering ancient Greek curses.Something stopped him.It was as if a cloud covered the sun, but worse. Light faded. Sound and colourdrained away. A cold, heavy presence passed over the beach, slowing time,dropping the temperature to freezing and making me feel like life was hopeless,fighting was useless.The darkness lifted.Ares looked stunned.Police cars were burning behind us. The crowd of spectators had fled.Annabeth and Grover stood on the beach, in shock, watching the water floodback around Ares's feet, his glowing golden ichor dissipating in the tide.Ares lowered his sword.'You have made an enemy, godling,' he told me. 'You have sealed your fate.Every time you raise your blade in battle, every time you hope for success, youwill feel my curse. Beware, Perseus Jackson. Beware.'His body began to glow.'Percy!' Annabeth shouted. 'Don't watch!'I turned away as the god Ares revealed his true immortal form. I somehowknew that if I looked, I would disintegrate into ashes.The light died.I looked back. Ares was gone. The tide rolled out to reveal Hades's bronzehelmet of darkness. I picked it up and walked towards my friends.But before I got there, I heard the flapping of leathery wings. Three evillooking grandmothers with lace hats and fiery whips drifted down from the skyand landed in front of me.The middle Fury, the one who had been Mrs Dodds, stepped forward. Herfangs were bared, but for once she didn't look threatening. She looked moredisappointed, as if she'd been planning to have me for supper, but had decided Imight give her indigestion.'We saw the whole thing,'she hissed. 'So... it truly was not you?'I tossed her the helmet, which she caught in surprise.'Return that to Lord Hades,' I said. 'Tell him the truth. Tell him to call off thewar.'She hesitated, then ran a forked tongue over her green, leathery lips. 'Livewell, Percy Jackson. Become a true hero. Because if you do not, if you evercome into my clutches again...'She cackled, savouring the idea. Then she and her sisters rose on their bat'swings, fluttered into the smoke-filled sky and disappeared.I joined Grover and Annabeth, who were staring at me in amazement.'Percy...' Grover said. 'That was so incredibly...''Terrifying,'said Annabeth.'Cool!' Grover corrected.I didn't feel terrified. I certainly didn't feel cool. I was tired and sore andcompletely drained of energy.'Did you guys feel that... whatever it was?' I asked.They both nodded uneasily.'Must've been the Furies overhead,' Grover said.But I wasn't so sure. Something had stopped Ares from killing me, andwhatever could do that was a lot stronger than the Furies.I looked at Annabeth, and an understanding passed between us. I knew nowwhat was in that pit, what had spoken from the entrance of Tartarus.I reclaimed my backpack from Grover and looked inside. The master bolt wasstill there. Such a small thing to almost cause World War III.'We have to get back to New York,' I said. 'By tonight.''That's impossible,' Annabeth said, 'unless we –''Fly,' I agreed.She stared at me. 'Fly, like, in an aeroplane, which you were warned never todo lest Zeus strike you out of the sky, and carrying a weapon that has moredestructive power than a nuclear bomb?''Yeah,' I said. 'Pretty much exactly like that. Come on.'