The Pacifist

Yellow

Joseph

It wasn't enough. He had held back, but he wanted so much more of Rachel's skin. It reacted so beautifully to his teeth and hands. And her neck? He was getting hard again just thinking about how it felt in his grasp. He cleared his throat.

"Are you hungry?"

Rachel bit her lip and nodded shyly. She brought her arms down now and Joseph noticed her resisting the urge to cover herself.

"Here," he said as he pulled the blanket out from under them to cover her with it. "What do you feel like eating? I can go grab something or we could go..." He let his voice trail off. This was turning into too much of a date. Sure the order of events were reversed, but it still involved sex and food.

Damn it! he thought. He didn't want to be too tender with her. It would be a lie, but my god she elicited the softness in him just as much she did his cruelty.

"We can stay in and order something."

"I'm close to lots of places. I'll go pick something up." He felt bad when he saw her face light up with understanding: he needed to get away from her, even if for a minute.

"Um, okay."

Joseph dressed quickly and left, opting to pick up pizza since it was the fastest. He had left her in bed naked and when he returned, he found her dressed, sitting on his sofa, and as insecure as ever. She smiled uncertainly when he returned.

"I was going to set the plates and cutlery. But... you have none."

Joseph nodded with a grunt. His possessions were truly limited, a habit he carried forward from his past. Belongings only weighed a person down. Belongings beyond bare necessities were indulgent and excessive and he felt he already had enough trouble with resisting the urge to indulge.

"Good thing I got pizza then." His joke fell flat. Joseph was never good with joking. He was too even toned and too intense. Sometimes people laughed because they thought his cold delivery was part of the act.

"Yeah."