Echoes of Fear. {REWRITING}

Chapter Seven

Kai's hallucinations had started a few days after Alex's death – at first, they had been minute, a whisper of his best friend's voice in his ear in a crowd, but soon enough, it was like he couldn't get away from the image of the broken, bloody face, the shattered glasses and red-stained raincoat. His friend's visage followed him everywhere, haunting him with seemingly every waking moment coming at risk of seeing it again.

During his stay at the facility Dr. Campbell had explained that it was all a result of the awful trauma he'd suffered, but Kai knew the truth – it was his guilt personified, reminding him of the terrible secret he had been keeping ever since that night, damning him for his lie.

It was what he deserved.

As if to punish him, Alex would appear in his mirror, at the foot of his bed to ask him, "How could you do something like that? I was your best friend, didn't you love me?"

Sleeping didn't deliver him either, with horrific nightmares plaguing him and forcing him awake screaming, which would worry his family more.

It was the hallucinations and night terrors that had led to him attempting to take his own life that night, alongside the crippling loneliness he'd brought onto himself by shutting out everyone who loved him.

Ren had come by the house not long after the funeral, begging him to talk to him, his voice choked with tears. Kai had told him very simply to get out, and soon enough, he shut his family out too, spending most of his time locked away in his room with the days blending into weeks and eventually, into months.

It was almost three months after Alex's death and his parents had been away to one of his father's important work dinners – as a political advisor, he'd been required to attend even though he was worried about leaving Kai at home. Amara had insisted it'd be fine, that she'd check on him and make sure he ate.

Approximately an hour later, she'd found her brother unconscious.

His breathing was shallow, laboured, an empty bottle of pills discarded at his side. He was so pale, barely even resembling her brother any more and in a panic, Amara had called an ambulance, though before it arrived, Kai stopped breathing, forcing his teenage sister to revive him with CPR.

When Kai had awoken in the hospital hours later, his father had been furious, angrier than he'd ever seen him, though underneath it all, there was a deep-seated anguish at the fact that his son, the boy he'd held as a baby, had tried to kill himself.

"How could you do something so selfish, Kumphakan?" Somsak had screamed in Thai as his wife had attempted to calm him down, her hands grasping desperately at his arms as she attempted to keep herself together.

She'd pleaded tearfully, "Somsak, look– he's just a boy, he needs help."

It was seeing his mother in such a state of devastation that had broken Kai, and despite feeble attempts to stay composed, he shattered. He'd never cried so hard in his life, it was like he was having a meltdown but somehow worse, his head hurting, nose running as his body shook something fierce. His parents, thankfully, were there for him, both surrounding him with a warm, comforting embrace that still didn't make him feel any better.

Things deteriorated more when he'd reunited with his sister after she'd come to visit after school. Amara, bright eyed, witty, excitable Amara seemed a shell of herself, her skin pallid and hollow, looking like it'd been peeled back against her bones. Her eyes were burning red with tears, like she'd not stopped crying.

Kai hated himself even more all of a sudden.

How could he have done that to her? How could he have put her through such a thing?