Dickheads

Shitface

10:40am
Pe was going pretty well so far, Oscar was on his little bench as usual just watching the game of dodgeball go by. And again he noticed some people were missing. Mark and Ffion were missing from our mixed lesson. Oscar asked sir if he could go and take a shit so he had a chance to leave the room, after not getting s reply from him he just left anyway because he's hard. Oscar took his sweet time to wander off and search for his mates.
10:45am
After five minutes of hardcore seeking, he could not find the missing Mark and Ffion. Until he came up to one of the few storage cupboards in school, and heard Mark inside.
'So afternI found out mine craft wasn't deleted, I was just so happy like...'
'Alright I get it! Just fucking do what you're here to do already. fuck sake Mark.' That was ffion in there with him. After missing out on the dance with no pants twice already that day, there was no chance Oscar would let this opportunity slip through his fingers. He turned the handle, and opened the unlocked door. He wasn't very happy with what he saw. Ffion was laying on the floor, fully clothed... and Mark was taking a shit on her face. It was almost like when apes throw shit at each other but instead it was much worse than what you would see at a zoo.
'Oscar wtf!?!' screamed ffion as the brown liquid streamed down her neck.
'I just wanted to see what you guys were doing in here! You should be in pe, not fucking shitting on each other!'
'Um actually I'm the only...'
'Mark I know you're the only one shitting, that's not my point mate. But since I'm here...'
'You're not joint in! Fuck off!' Ffion was screaming at this point and was enraged by oscars suggestion, she grabbed him by the ear and threw him out of the room.
'Fuck man. I missed out again'
The only thing Oscar really gained from this experience was that he now knew what Mark had for breakfast today.