Captain Lambda and the Empire of Evil

Chapter Five: Clutches Of Death!

The planet POLARI is under a cloak of darkness, as our hero SPACE CAPTAIN LAMBDA, seeks to free DOCTOR GALBRAITH and take down EMPEROR ANIACAL. On his way to recruit the GREMLINS to the cause of freedom, Lambda is attacked by a MONSTEROUS BIRD CREATURE! Narrowly escaping the jaws of death, Lambda must return to face the monster to retrieve the machines the Gremlins need to defeat the Emperor!

FEATURING: Space Captain Lambda, hero of Earth on a mission to save a lost scientist; Zip, Lambda's trusty robot companion; Domina, leader of the rebel Leatherones; and Uwuna, leader of the Gremlins.

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Captain Lambda felt like he was back in the closet. The inside of the machine was cramped, even with all the circuits removed. The magnetic tape reels remained, partly obscuring his view out of the dark box as the Gremlins wheeled him out onto the landing pad. He checked the pockets of his new cargo shorts for his raygun and the small two-way radio the Gremlins provided him. He'd abandoned the shredded remains of his shirt but kept the leather jacket; that, at least, fared better than the shirts against the weathering he'd been taking.

One of the Gremlins pounced on top of the box and started attaching various shiny objects around the side. Another loosened the magnetic tape and let it hang out, the light bouncing off its surface.

As they finished up, it was time to grab some attention. Lambda pulled out his Detect-o-Device and flipped to the casual listening setting. He pulled up some of his favourite retro music as he pointed the small but mighty speaker out to a hole. The small device began blasting an unnaturally loud beat of drums and guitars across the forest. Lambda's shiny closet began to shake violently from the volume.

All dressed up and nowhere to go, walkin' the streets all alone.

A screech echoed back from among the treetops. The bird burst out from among the branches and leaves and soared into the air.

Who's gonna take you home tonight? Who's gonna take you home?

Its eyes were fierce, even with the distance, and its talons shone in the high noon sun. The creature's size exploded into view, its talons ready to grasp. Lambda braced himself against the sides of the closet.

Does God bless your transsexual heart, true trans soul rebel?

The impact slammed Lambda into the side of the box and the centre of gravity spun around, his equipment going flying. A claw had pierced one side and rested just a few millimetres from his face. The box was on its side, bouncing around in the air as the bird climbed back into the sky with him in its grasp. It was likely just it swerving through the wind currents, but it was almost like the bird was bobbing its hair to the music. With luck, he thought, it'll take me right back to its nest.

Well, you should've been a mother. You should've been a wife. You should've been gone from here years ago. You should be living a different life.

He pulled himself up to see the trees flying by outside and, approaching rapidly, a mesh of branches and glinting ephemera. The Lambda and the box landed with a sharp thud, snapping several branches as it crashed amongst the bird's loot. The bird rested in the centre and pecked around the outside of the box, collecting the various strings of tape and throwing it around like it was trying to achieve a lived-in, effortless casual look to his home.

Who's gonna take you home tonight?

On the far side, Lambda spied the missing equipment crucial to the radio mast. Exactly as the Gremlins described; a circular box with shiny chrome antennas. He grabbed the two-way radio and signalled for his pickup. Then, with one swift move, he kicked open a side panel and threw his Detect-o-Device out of the nest, deep down into the forest below.