Unsaid Words

I am what I am, because of me.

No one is ever going to love you,

Each breath you take is oxygen wasted.

I wish you were never born,

These phrases soon became part of my everyday life. The pain that these words once caused a constant presence, the weight on my shoulders from knowing that I wasn't good enough, was also something I got used to.

It's not that a bad family who did horrible things raised me this way. In fact, my family was the best. I have loving parents who just want me to be happy and many siblings, both older and younger, I would die for.

I was never physically bullied, just belittled and teased by the kind phrases used every day. Nobody ever made me the butt of a joke or humiliated me in any way. But taunted by the lingering eyes and twisted looks in each passing glance.

I am a product of my own creation.

I flinch when people yell, for reasons I don't even know.

I fight to make others happy, when every smile I show is faker than the last.

I fortify others' self images, whilst my own darkens and shatters.

I suffer from an anxiety that I gave myself, the literal definition of a failure.

Every day, I get out of bed and drown even when there is no water in sight. All because of what I put myself through and I don't know how to stop it. So I keep it buried deep inside me and live in the mask of happiness I crafted from the pain I never went through.

I was worth nothing, and I knew it.

I was useless, and I accepted it.

I was aware that I never got anything right and yet I refuse to give up.

Hey guys, welcome to another Fic, Yes this is a prologue of sorts, that's why it's short.

Another chapter will come out Tuesday next week <33.