To be the Villainess

O58.

Chapter 58

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I PACED BACK and forth, my nails digging into my teeth as I bit them anxiously. My hair was a chaotic mess, strands falling over my face as I raked my fingers through it with a frustrated groan. Tears brimmed in my eyes, threatening to spill, but I stubbornly blinked them back, refusing to let them fall.

“My lady,” Sebastian’s deep voice broke through my turmoil.

I spun around and seized his collar, yanking him closer. My gaze locked onto his, sharp and unyielding.

“Shut up, will you?” I snapped, my voice trembling with barely restrained fury. “I don’t want your comfort. I want answers.” My grip tightened on his collar, my chest heaving as the weight of confusion and anger crushed me. “This wasn’t what I expected. I can’t remember—what else should I remember?!” My words spilled out in a frantic stream. Why would Kyro done that to me?  “A novel? An infuriating game? What the hell is she talking about?! I endured it all, and now she’s just playing with me? Does she have a death wish?”

Sebastian’s sudden movement startled me. He pulled me into his arms, holding me tightly against his chest. The warmth of his embrace, so steady and secure, caught me off guard.

“Faerie, is it?” he murmured softly.

My breath hitched. That name... I froze. It clawed at memories I had buried deep, memories I thought were long gone. Faerie. That name belonged to someone I had left behind, locked away when I decided to live as Arthemice and carry out her revenge. Yet here it was, dragged back to the surface, ripping through the persona I had painstakingly constructed.

“She fooled me,” I whispered hoarsely, the words trembling on my lips. “She just wanted me to suffer. For what? Because I created this world? Because I wrote it? None of this makes sense—I don’t remember creating a world this cruel.”

I buried my face in his chest, my tears soaking into his uniform as I let my composure crumble. My shoulders shook, and the sobs I had been holding back burst free. “Sebastian,” I choked, my voice cracking, “all of them... they were captured because of me, weren’t they?” My heart twisted painfully. “Cecelia, Darious, Zacharias, Lumine... they didn’t deserve this.” My voice dropped to a whisper. “They won’t burn. I’ll make sure of it. I swear.”

Sebastian gently cupped my face, his emerald-green eyes filled with a mixture of concern and determination. “No, it’s not your—”

I cut him off, pressing a finger to his lips. “Save that advice for later,” I said quietly, my voice steadier now. I took a deep breath, pulling myself together. The vulnerability I had shown moments ago felt foreign, out of place. Straightening, I pushed the weakness aside and lifted my chin.

I shot Sebastian a sharp glare, masking my lingering turmoil. “Don’t look at me like that,” I muttered. “This is your fault for making me lean on you.” My lips curled into a sardonic smile, though my chest ached with conflicting emotions. A bitter laugh escaped me. ‘How ironic. You, of all people, chose my side instead of hers. Arthemice. Your one true love,’ I thought.

“Sebastian,” I called, my voice quieter than I intended. His grip on my waist tightened slightly as he hummed in response, waiting for me to speak.

“Will you... will you let me remember all of my past memories?” I finally asked, my words measured but laced with desperation. I knew the weight of what I was asking. Sebastian’s ability wasn’t something he used lightly—he could alter or erase memories at will.