Golden Luckenbooth

Sixty-Four

The glee on Harry's face would rival that of the person who will eventually score the winning goal for England in the Euro Cup finals. His eyes light up, his lips widen, and that dimple deepens on his left cheek. His eyes flit to mine, wonder filling them like gold dust swirling in a sunbeam as his hand shifts slightly, pressing further into my belly as the bairn repeatedly kicks at it like they're practising kickboxing with Harry holding the paddle.

My heart swells at the moment. It's one example of the many precious moments we'll have and never be able to recreate again. Oh, sure, with other children, they will kick, and Harry will press his hand to my belly in glee, but there's nothing like the first time.

Ms. Porter clears her throat, and Harry grimaces, leaning over to give me a quick chaste kiss before whispering in my ear, "I wish I could do that all day."

Me too, my love. Me too.

As he exits the exam room with my empty plate and glass, it's a reminder of the fact that he's going to miss so many of these special first moments while he's on tour, and there's nothing I can do about that. Perhaps I can create a little journal or book or photo album of them? As soon as I consider the idea, I discard it. There's no way I'll have time between working and taking care of the baby. My heart droops like a mother bird whose nest has been raided.

Taking a deep breath, I focus my attention back on Ms. Porter's pup as I prepare for the neutering surgery. This poor puppy will never have the opportunity to know what it's like to be a father. My hand hesitates, and then I shake off the feeling. I'm a vet. This is what I do.

Hours later, after watching Paddy carefully lock the clinic door, I wander back to my home, my feet dragging, and my body a beached whale, finally granted a reprieve from the waves. Harry greets me at the door with a cup of tea, guiding me to the sofa where he invites me to swing my feet into his lap so he can remove my shoes and perform another foot rub. Contentedly, I sigh, sipping the hot liquid, grateful for someone who knows exactly what I need.

When Paddy unlocks and enters the kitchen door, I'm taken aback. Luckily, I've managed not to spill my tea. Nonchalantly, he plops into the armchair nearby.

"Ready?" he asks Harry, and I'm left as confused as a puppy encountering a leash for the first time.

"I think so," my boyfr– fiancé agrees.

Paddy turns his attention to me. "Here's the new safety plan. We agreed to lay it all out for you so you could identify any flaws or concerns before we launch it."

Oh. The events of the previous night flood into my brain again, and suddenly I'm less relaxed than I had been moments prior.

I take a deep breath in through my nose, blowing air out through my mouth as I make eye contact with Harry. "Okay. I'm ready."

Paddy nods. "First, we're going to have three staff on your security detail. I've already reached out to a couple of men who have been reliable in the past. We'll work three 8-hour shifts every day. That way, you'll always have security physically nearby. At the clinic, we'll stay out front where we can assess threats that come in the front door. Overnight, we'll stay awake and alert here in the kitchen, taking a walk around the outside of the property every hour. The swing shift will go wherever you need them. If you're still working, they'll be at the clinic. If you're home, they'll work from the kitchen."

I feel the constraints of the plan suffocating me, and I hold up my hand to take another deep breath. "For how long?" My gaze transfers between the two men and when neither of them answers immediately, I focus on Harry.

"Until we build our house, babe."

"Oh." I digest this news for a bit before nodding at Paddy. That's a long time, and I chafe at the idea of having extra men around while I'm dealing with the last stages of pregnancy and a new baby, but then I recall the look on that woman's face as she brandished her weapon, and I know it's the smart thing to do whether I'm happy about it or not. It might actually make me feel safer. "Go on," I encourage Paddy.