Quinn Walker - Let's Start Over

Chapter Thirty-One - Lauryn

It was finally December, and it was finally the weekend. Lauryn and Ella were still staying at our house, but I hadn't had the biggest chance to see them because of school, however, today I got the whole day to get to know Lauryn properly.

Ella was going into the city today to meet with friends she hadn't seen in a while, and Katie, Caitlin and Kyra were going to training; leaving Lauryn and me on our own for the day. I still didn't have a license so we couldn't drive anywhere, but we could always walk if we found somewhere we wanted to go.

It was early when I woke up, and I didn't want to disturb anyone else, so I grabbed my journal and sat back in bed. Kyra and I had been sharing a room while Lauryn and Ella were here so that they could have their room and not have to sleep on the couch. Kyra, however, was still asleep beside me, so I was cautious not to disturb her by turning on one of my reading lights to shine purely on my page.

* * *

It's good having Lauryn and Ella visit. It feels like I'm meeting more of my family, well Katie's family, but I hope to some extent that they will be like my family. I didn't have the biggest family, as Lauryn and I established, but I'm subtly hoping that with the introduction to them, and hopefully eventually Caitlin's family, I'll have a big family.

Ella was nicer than I expected if I'm being honest. Obviously, she seems nice on her TikTok, and Katie always mentioned that she was nice, but a small part of me always feared that she would be like all of the other stuck-up TikTokers - thank god she's not. She made dinner for us multiple nights this week, and even if she wasn't the most talented cook, she somehow made the simple dishes taste absolutely phenomenal.

Lauryn and I are getting closer, which is good. It feels like having another sister, and another best friend. Having things like our sexuality in common made us more comfortable speaking to each other, and gave me someone who understood how I felt - the confusion of being a gay teenager. She was like a sister to me, and I was hoping that one day I'd get to meet her girlfriend who seemed equally as kind.

The final thing on my mind is Abbie. For some reason, she still won't talk to me. I've gotten closer to getting her to talk to me but she still finds ways to dismiss me and ignore my questions. I've asked her why she isn't talking to me, and I've asked what I can do to fix everything, but somehow I still can't figure out what to do. I didn't think that not saying 'I love you' back could have such complications, but somehow we've ended up with just that. Even my letter didn't work, and that's my love language - aside from physical touch - so I don't know what to do anymore,  I don't know what I can do anymore.

* * *

"Good morning baby girl," Kyra mumbled as she rolled closer to me. 

She rested her head against my hip, so I carefully ran my fingers through her brunette locks. "Good morning, Ky," I replied.

"Ky? That's a new one," she questioned, turning her attention up to me.

"Do you like it?" I responded.

"Yeah, but only from you," she smiled, burying her face into my palm as she took my hand from her hair. "What are you doing?" she murmured into my hand.

"Writing."

"Writing, what?"

"Just journaling, about Ella, Lauryn and Abbie. Nothing bad about Ella and Lauryn I promise, but a few negatives about Abbie," I giggled.

"Are you okay though? You know I'm here if you need to talk," Kyra asked.

"I'm fine, I swear. Just still trying to get through this thing with Abbie. Maybe it's time for us to end, I just don't think I can keep going like this," I explained.