Lost and Found • mikhaiah au

25. A Storm of Doubts

It turned out to be not enough.

Agnes pulled herself out of the pool, the cool water streaming down her arms and legs, but it did nothing to drown the thoughts swirling in her mind.

She had hoped that swimming—her usual escape—would help clear her head, to wash away the doubts that had been creeping in ever since that lunch. But it wasn't working. Her brows furrowed as she sat on the edge, staring at the water.

She wanted so badly to believe that her feelings for Maiko were real, untainted by the shadow of Maki and Althea's past. That what she felt wasn't just some echo of a love story that had ended tragically.

But now, with every comparison, with every memory shared, she wasn't so sure anymore.

Agnes wiped her face, feeling the sting of chlorine in her eyes, though she knew it wasn't just the pool irritating them.

Her chest felt heavy with doubt, a weight she couldn't shake. She hugged her knees to her chest, her wet hair clinging to her skin as she tried to sort through her tangled emotions.

She had been so certain before.

Certain that her feelings toward Maiko was her own, something new and untouched by the past. But the more she thought about it, the more she began to question whether she was genuinely falling for Maiko, or if she was simply being swept up in everyone else's stories and expectations.

Agnes stood up abruptly, frustration etched across her face as she marched toward the locker room.

The water dripping from her still clinging to her skin, each step echoed her growing unrest, her thoughts a chaotic storm that refused to quiet.

Once inside the locker room, she turned on the shower, the cold water cascading over her, but it did little to soothe her nerves. She needed to leave, to escape the swirl of doubt that had invaded her mind.

She quickly dried off, throwing on her clothes. As she reached for her phone, she noticed a flood of messages from Maiko. Agnes hesitated, staring at the screen with a sinking feeling.

The messages were filled with affection, with expressions of love and care that were both comforting and overwhelming. They were everything Agnes wanted to feel but wasn't sure she deserved or could reciprocate now.

Her doubts loomed large, making it impossible for her to respond. The warmth of Maiko's words was a stark contrast to the uncertainty clouding her mind.

Agnes felt a pang of guilt as she struggled with her own emotions. The genuine love Maiko had shared seemed just out of reach, buried under her own insecurities.

Agnes swiped through the messages, her heart heavy as she realized she couldn't bring herself to reply.

Her doubts were too overwhelming, making her feel unworthy and uncertain. She closed her eyes, letting the phone slip from her grasp onto the bench beside her.

Taking a deep breath, she tried to clear her mind, but the doubts continued to gnaw at her, leaving her feeling even more isolated from the love that was waiting for her.

Agnes took one last, lingering look at the phone before she made her decision. The weight of her doubts was too much to bear. With a heavy heart, she decided to leave the messages unanswered.

Agnes then made her way through the campus, heading towards Fons and Ria in hopes that their company would help her push aside the doubts that had been plaguing her.

The familiar paths and the soft rustling of leaves seemed soothing, but her thoughts were still a tangled mess.

As she walked, her phone rang, jolting her from her thoughts. The screen lit up with Maiko's name, and Agnes hesitated for a moment before answering. Her thumb hovered over the green button, and she could almost hear Maiko's voice in her mind, filled with the warmth she had been avoiding.