𝐝𝐞𝐤𝐮𝐛𝐚𝐤𝐮/𝐛𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐤𝐮 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

pinky promise - bakudeku

TW! suicide is implied in this chapter!

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katsuki stood on the roof of aldera junior high, staring harshly down at the koi pond, watching at the koi swam around the burnt notebook. his jaw clenched as he thought back to about 20 minutes ago, when he had been the one to burn and toss the nerds notebook out the window. when he had said...

katsuki shook his head and sneered at the koi trying to eat the notebook, "that idiot is taking a long time to fetch his stupid notebook..." he murmured to himself, stuffing his hands in his school pants pockets. he sighed and frowned at himself, why does he care anyway? he doesn't. 

the creak of the old wooden door brought katsuki out of his thoughts his breath catching in his throat as he turned to see who it was. it was izuku, burn marks still on his uniform and tears streaming down his freckled cheeks. 

katsuki stared in shock, hands clenching his pockets. the nerd really did listen to him, huh? he wasn't supposed to. the stupid nerd was supposed to bounce back like he always did, mumbling about how he would become a hero no matter what with that sparkle in his eyes... his eyes were now dull. 

"...deku?"

izuku gasped and his eyes darted to katsuki, wide eyes blinking at him like he sees a ghost. he walks forward and shuts the door behind him, clutching onto his yellow backpack straps with all his might. "k-kacchan? what are you doing here?" he asks nervously, his voice shaky.

katsuki scowls and confidently steps up to izuku, who cowers and looks at the ground in shame. "that doesn't matter. what matters is what you're doing up here after i--" he pauses, biting the inside of his cheek. "...whatever. just-- go home deku." he muttered. 

izuku suddenly looks up at him with anger, shocking the blonde. "go home? you just want me to go home, kacchan?"

katsuki avoids izukus green, blazing eyes in favor of staring at the skyline to his right. he observes all the skyscrapers and high buildings... and he can't stop the bile that rises in his throat as he imagines izuku being on top of one of those alone and going through with his advice. 

taking a deep breath, katsuki looks back to izuku. "i'm not leaving until you're off of this damn roof." he grunts stubbornly.

izuku sniffles and hangs his head as tears fall of his cheeks to the dirty ground. he stares at his red shoes. "why? why kacchan?" he cries out, small body shaking.

katsuki gaze hardens at the question. he hates that he doesn't know. he doesn't know why he couldn't go home without making sure izuku didn't jump off the roof. he doesn't know why he cares so much about the nerd, but still bullies him daily. he doesn't know why he said the things he did. he doesn't fucking know, and it makes him so fucking angry.  

"i don't know." he answers honestly. he gasps lightly as izuku pushes his chest, making him stumble back a little bit. he doesn't have time to react before izuku steps closer to him, so close their noses almost touch. 

izuku is huffing, eyebrows pinched, and teary eyes narrowed. he's angry, and katsuki knows he is because his cheeks are blotchy red, like they get when he's upset. his bottom lip wobbles too, and katsuki knows that's when he's trying to hold back tears. "stupid kacchan! y-you're such a hypocrite! one minute you say you want me to kill myself--" katsuki flinches as izukus shouts, "and the next you stop me from taking your advice! i don't understand you, kacchan! i-i don't think you even understand yourself!"

izuku shouts in katsukis face, and for a second, he feels guilty when the blonde's eyes go wide and a flash of guilt and regret go through them. he takes a deep breath before speaking again, this time softer, "i-i can't keep doing this, kacchan. you confuse me so much and it's making my head spin."