14. Hide

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Just help me run away from everyone. I need a place to stay.
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Nikita's perspective☆
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It's scary. It's scary knowing I will genuinely never see him again. I'll walk past the streets, and it just won't be there. His presence. Every time I visit the stadium, it won't reek of wild roses. The very idea frightens me. I don't want to do this. I don't want to go home, I don't want to go anywhere without him. I can't just fly to Japan, though.

Not when he hates my guts. My palm stings from the sensation of his pure skin against it. I never imagined being to one to hurt him. I wanted to kill everyone who ever laid a hand on him. On my boy. But am I just as bad as them? Am I exactly like the villains I want to protect him from? I can't be, right? No, I just want to see my boy.

He's different from back then. He doesn't listen like he used to. He doesn't think so much. He's not a child anymore. He's not mine anymore, but I can't bear to accept it. I just want to leave this world behind and start over with him. But I can't blame the universe for something that is purely my fault. I just can't. I really wish I could.

But it's my fault. I know that, but I still cling to the thought of him like it's natural. I can't. I don't go home that night. So many missed calls. Why does he get to act like he cares? I don't care. It's winter, so I don't even get to watch the sunrise. Sunrises are too late in winter. I used to watch them with Michael. We'd stay up the whole day just to see it.

All of that could be destroyed because of my stupid temper. I know I won't see him again. And maybe in my next life, I'll be with him because I won't be getting over him in this one. I don't care if it ends up badly for me; I really will never stop loving him. I have to go. I have to go to Japan. His flights today, right? I don't know when.

For the first time, I'm going to rely on someone.

—☆—
[Nikita]
Noa. When's your flight?

[Noa]
Why do u need to know,

[Nikita]
Because I just do

[Noa]
At 6pm.

[Nikita]
Thanks, you're he best

—☆—
It's 5am right now. I should call Father just to say I'm safe. I instantly regret it when I'm met with his screams across the phone. But he sounds a little bit worried. More angry than so, but at least he actually does care. He's not making up his feelings; he's just worried about his daughter.

And because of that, I only feel guiltier about leaving. "I'm safe, so don't worry. I'm going to be okay, but I'm going." It's nothing personal. I just don't want to live my life so full of regrets. "I'm sorry; I just want to be happy in this life, too. Because I'm not sure about the next." I don't even know if there's even a next. Shouldn't I live like I only have one?

But maybe I want two. I can't have both. I can hear my father sigh in defeat. "You know, if none do much for you." Oh, here we go. "But you have a place that makes you happier, right? I can only control you so far as much as I hate that. I can't stop you, Nikita. But please, if you need anything even if its money. You're still a Moriah, and money is not something my daughter will ever worry about."

Sometimes, he's nice like this. I like it this way when he's kind. "I know, Father. I'm a Moriah. Be safe, okay? I'll be fine, so don't worry." I hang up. I don't need to walk. I am not walking to the airport. I don't care if I shouldn't have any luxuries right now ot whether I deserve them. Maybe I don't deserve anything nice right now. I call the taxi.

I'm so sorry, Michael. I have to get him to forgive me. I have to be his again, or I don't know what I'll do. I don't care about my pride or fucking dignity. Fuck, this is pathetic. I made one mistake, but I'm the one reaching out desperately? I know, I broke my promise. But he left me. He didn't reach out, and he shunned me when I did.

Truthfully, I've cried too much over him, but I know I'll never be able to let him go. I just can't seem to find a balance between obsession and like. Maybe I never will. But I don't really care. I stroll around the airport, sleep, eat breakfast, browse some more. They've got arcades. Wait, shit. I didn't pack like anything. I've got my laptop and some shit in my bag.

I don't care. It's 4 pm. And I see the team walk in. I've already booked the flight. It's theirs. Noa mentioned they'd fly first class, so so am I. I love having money. Well, it's not like Noa didn't offer to buy my ticket. He did tell me their seats, though. But my whole train of thought stops at the sight of Michael.

He looks so tired. He looks so much like the boy I first met. And that alone makes my heart rip into tiny little shreds that I will never be able to glue back together. "Fuck, my sweet boy."

—☆—
Chapter end !!

Chapter lowkey made me sad smhh either way
Eat well, sleep well, and hydrate. I love you so much. The final moon does too.

𝐋𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍 𝐋𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐏𝐒. Michael Kaiser Where stories live. Discover now