Forever Yours -Jared Padalecki-

Trying to help

Jared's POV

Sam came.

She got worried.

And she saw my scars. The new ones.

It almost made her cry. I do not want her to be hurt because of me.

She did not know what Jensen just found out. He saw me trying agian. Trying to kill myself.

Pills.

Alot of them.

He just looked at me. Hurt. Crying.

And I felt it. Guilt. Building up inside me. Like when Sam saw my scars. Guilt. Alot of it.

Guilt.

I made them cry. The two most amzing persons I know. My best friend and girlfriend.

"Why?" Sam asked.

"Hard to explain." I said.

"Try. I just want to help."

"I know. It's just. Um. I can't. Sorry." I said, looking at the floor.

She put her thumb under my chin and lifted it, looked me in the eyes with sympathy.

"You know I love you. Right?" She said.

"Yeah. Of course I do!" I said.

"Then tell me what's wrong."

"No."

"It will never get better if you don't speak up. I, of all, know exactly how you feel. I been there too. I promise it will help telling." She said.

"I can't even tell Jensen." I said looking at him with guilt filling my eyes.

He got up from his chair and walked over to me. He sat down beside me and said;

"Don't feel guilty. I can see it in your eyes. It's not because we blame you for being depressed. It's a human thing. I know it's hard righ now, but we just want you to be happy. And I know you'll get better. You're strong." He said while looking in my eyes.

I was speechless. I did not know what to say.

We where just sitting there, in an akward silence. I did not like it. At all.

I told them that it was because my dad died 6 months ago.

It was partly because if that. But also because of guilt. Yeah. Guilt.

I have done alot bad things in the past. I regret it so much. I feel so guilty.

"You know I've been with you through so much Jared. I know alot of what you have done, and regrets. Just tell me what it is this time." Jensen said.

"Y-you don't know this one." I stuttered out.

Sam looked so confused. She probably wonders what I have done. She don't want to know.

"What's going on. What have you done, and what do you regret so much?" She said confused.

"Y-you don't want to know." I am on the edge of crying right now. I can not handle it. It is too hard to think of.

"I wont judge. You know that. Right?" She said. I can not look at her right know. I can not even look at Jensen.

It is too hard. Everything is too hard right now.

I just want to die.

----------
Sorry it's a little sort, but it has to be.

What do think Jared is regretting so much? Why wont he tell it?

I would like to hear your thoughts on it. It would mean alot.

Thanks for reading. Love ya :D