Forever Yours -Jared Padalecki-

How I Found Him

Jensen's POV

Sam's death took it's turn on Jared. He did not leave the house, he did not eat anything, and I was worried. I had my reasons to be worried. He had previously tried to kill himself .5 times in fact, and each time, I managed stopped him. I checked up on him as much as I could, but then I found him.

I went to take a shower. It was longer than I expected. At least long enough for him to overdose on painkillers. When I saw my best friend laying on his bed, stone dead, I felt a kind of sadness I have never experienced before. My heart broke into may pieces. 

He was holding a letter. A letter I did not want to read, but I knew I had to.

"Dear Jensen.

I am so sorry you had to find me like this. I really am. 

You mean the world to me. I hope you know that. I also hope that you know that I really tried to get better. For you. I love you more than anyone on this planet, and I cannot thank you enough for staying by my side all this time. You are the best friend I have ever had.

I want you to know why I decided to end my life. I want you to understand why.

You know very well that I have had a depression for quite a while, and you also know that I have tried to end my life a few times before.

My depression started at a very young age. I felt left out. As the years went by, my depression only got worse. I became an adult, and needed to take responsibility of myself. I tried, but everything seemed to go wrong. I then hid myself from the world. I became invincible to everyone who did not know me.

You tried to help me, and I really appreciate it, but I never felt happy. Started therapy, but it did not help at all. I started in support groups, but with the same results. 

After a few years, you made me go again, and I met Sam. I fell in love, and the future seemed brighter. Thank you for making me go again. You are the reason I met Sam in the first place.

She made me happy, and felt like I belonged in this world again. Our time together was amazing. Wonderful. I enjoyed every second of it.

When she died - God how do I describe the feeling - I felt empty. I felt my life leaving my body completely, and that was when I realized that the world wanted me rather dead than alive. So I obeyed.

I know Sam is in Heaven, and I know that I will end up in Hell, but at least I know both of us will have some peace. I can finally fly away. When I took the pills, I felt a little bit of happiness again, because I knew that I would soon be free.

Jensen, please stay strong for me. Do what makes you happy. Find yourself a partner. Remember our good times along with the bad, and please do me a favor. When you die, say hi to Sam in Heaven for me. Tell her that I love her, and miss her.

I will always remember you Jensen.

I am sorry.

"Jared"

I broke down crying. I never cried so hard in my entire life. I just lost my best friend in a horrible way.

I will stay strong. I will carry on, and I will remember him.

_____________________

Hey guys. I am sorry to end the story like this, but it was my plan from start. I hope you enjoyed it.

As you might know, I like to kill of my characters in my storys, so if you want to read more, be prepared.

I love ya'll. Have a nice day