Why Do Tears Keep Falling

My Tales From Gloom

NOUHRAN

I tossed and tossed in bed, but sleep was nowhere to steal away my worries and make me forget the moment. I couldn't finish reading because the notes on that book sounded very heartbreaking to read.

Pain was etched all over, and the words were full of many regrets and a plea to be free from sorrow. 

Those thoughts were just like mine. I wanted to be free from everything. I wanted to be a free bird that was not trapped, but it never happened.

I wanted to know the story, but I didn't have the energy to ask for something like this. A secret, a memory, a longing, a plea, and a hope.

The bed dipped as a heavy figure made it's way towards the other side, which meant Yazid was back. I tried to close my eyes, pretending to be sleeping.

As he wraps me up in his arms, Yazid draws me close to him. I inhaled quickly as I wrapped my arms around him. There was a familiarity I felt in those arms, as though his body had been sculpted to fit my own body perfectly. 

"She was an innocent soul that was filled with so much love and kindness just like you," Yazid started.

"Sorry, who are you referring to?" I asked, even though I knew where he was heading.

"You want to learn about her, so allow me to do that. I know you went through her stuff in the storeroom, but you're curious. You want to know her story," Yazid said as he reached for my hand, threading our fingers together. I could sense the reassurance he was trying to convey through his move as if he wanted to comfort himself.

Even though he's trembling, I want to know her and know what happened. He once told me that she was killed, but what happened? Why was she killed? I want to know everything about her. 

He was shaking in fear, and at that time, I did the only thing that came to mind. Slowly and steadily, I let my lips connect to his; it was a quick and rash decision, and I don't know how I did that. Yazid inhaled sharply as he ran his thumb back and forth.

He froze. His eyes slowly moved upward to meet mine, and when he looked through my eyes, He also gave in.

It was the first for me, and he did it in a passionate and comforting manner. We part for air, and Yazid holds me close to his arms, caging me in his broad chest to feel his warmth as the silent evening brings solace to our hearts.

It's a quiet moment. Both in thought and lost. The clock clicking a serene sound.

"I met her during one of my postings to her town. A disguised creature that wants to hide from the world. She appears to be strong, but inside her are shattered pieces of glass," Yazid started. His voice is low as he tries to hide the pain. 

She looks like a man because she dresses exactly like one. She hides her identity, and the people don't know either.

That angelic voice girls used to have was not there; she hardly talked, and when she did, you would never differentiate it from a man's. As he stares into space, Yazid holds me tight. It's like he's trying to remember the sad moments and the bitterness they carry.

Every day I used to see her in one spot, and her eyes caught my attention. They reflect pain, expose sadness, and twinkle with darkness that's very unfair to a man.

"Don't you have a home?" I asked her once.

She spent a week before she answered my question. "A home is somewhere you will be pleased to return to. A place where your loved ones will receive you with smiles and happy faces, not a building that's filled with so much loss and agony." She said her eyes were filled with unshed tears.