YOURS

13

I wake up the next morning still feeling ashamed for last night. I can't believe I did that. I get out of bed and went downstairs to have breakfast; my father was at the table reading his newspaper. I sit quietly, I felt kind of nervous, it's been long since I was alone with my father. A maid brings me a plate, I grab a piece of bread and grapes. 

"Morning Emilia" he says not taking his eyes of the paper

"Morning father" I said fearing he will say something about what is going on lately about me, I'm not prepared to answer.

"How is your morning going?" his voice sounds calm

"Is nice and yours?"

"Relaxing" he stands up and walks towards me, put the newspaper next to me in the table. "I'm glad that you are here, daughter, I want you to know, that as long I'm alive, nobody is going to make you feel less and doesn't matter what you have done, this is your home, and you are always welcome" he touched my shoulder and kissed my head, after that he walked outside the room. Those words cut deep in my heart, don't know why I needed them really bad. It cure a piece of my soul. I eat and go to our home library, to pick a new book to read I finished the one I had.

"Miss" i hear Mary voice behind me. I turn around and walked fast to her.

"Tell me you got news" i hold her hands

"I do, but they are not good"

"Is he ok, is he alive?" i said worried

"He is alive, but I'm afraid what your mother told you is true, he indeed went to that place"

"no" I walked to a sofa that was near and drop myself in it. "It cant be, but why, he told me he loved me"

"Maybe he went there to hide"

"Hide? i bet there's other million places to hide" I said mad, my eyes watered a little, but I'm used to this, is just men being men. "Thanks, Mary" I clean my eyes, I'm not crying anymore, I'm tired of it. When she was about to leave, I called her. "Mary how do you apologies to someone that you accidentally kissed?"

"well, that's kind of specific, how do you accidentally kiss someone?" she looked at me confused

"Nevermind, thanks Mary"

I spend the morning reading and thinking on how to face steven, glimpse of the kiss came from time to time to my head, making my heart race a little. I shake my head to concentrate, then I thought of his lips, eyes, smile, his hair falling in between he's eyes, those green eyes or are they hazel? what is wrong with me. I decided to go to him and just say sorry. I took a carriage and, on the way there a saw a flower shop, he said that he gives flowers to people he respects, so that's a perfect way to let him know I respect him and I'm sorry. I bought a bouquet and went to his office; I was standing in front of his door and my hands where shaking. When I was about to knock, he opens the door, we almost bump to each other. He looked surprised but fast smiled when he saw me, that smile, my heart was beating hard, i breath in.

"This is for you" I give him the flowers just a mix of random lilies. he looks at them confused.

He chuckled. Please just stop smiling, I want to kiss him again, what is wrong with me. "Come in" he moves a side; I walked pass him.

"so I'm intrigued again, why the flowers?" he said closing the door

"I'm sorry I kissed you" i fast say

"ok and the flowers?"

"You once said that you give flowers to people you respect, I want you to know i respect you and as a friend I know I shouldn't kiss you like that, is just that, the things that are happening in my life I don't control them or want them, I wanted to do something that I actually control and wanted, is it strange?"