Blue Blood ~ Young Royals

Did It Again

We stand in the empty hallway in silence, Simon fidgeting with the zipper of his coat, me leaning against the wall with my hands in my pockets. We agreed to talk when school was done but neither of us knows what to say now. I don't know how I feel, how should I know what to say? I sigh at the same time that Simon does, oh god. I bite my lip to hold in the laughter but when Simon chuckles I allow myself to do the same.

He takes a tiny step closer to me. "We... should talk. Right? I don't think we said everything earlier..." The thought of talking is both relieving and nerve wracking, in some ridiculous way. I take a deep breath and nod slowly. Simon seems nervous but determined. "You, uh... Did I... Should... Oh fuck."

I chuckle softly. At least I'm not the only one who's so nervous I could die. "You could... start with what you thought of it?"

Simon drops his gaze to his hands, clearly a little embarrassed when he says, "I... liked it... But you, uh..."

I blush, my heart launching into a full on drum solo. What would've happened if I hadn't pushed him away? "I was confused... I still am, but..."

He looks up at me questioningly. "Would you... would you do that again?"

Part of me is screaming no, I'm straight, I don't kiss boys. But another part of me screams far louder, it screams yes, yes I would, in fact, I'd like to kiss you right now. I bite my lip, unsure of what to think or feel or say. Honestly, at this point, I don't know what I feel for Simon anymore. I know what someone else would say it is, but I don't know what to call it myself.

I realise I haven't answered the question and when I look up, Simon's looking right into my eyes. "Um..."

"It's okay if you wouldn't" He says, looking a tiny bit disappointed. "But then at least we both know where we stand. I know I shouldn't have done what I did and that's why I ran away and I'm sorry-"

I don't know why I've done it but I pull him to me mid sentence and kiss him. He's surprised at first but responds quickly, wrapping his arms around my waist. The small voice telling me no dies to a whisper that's barely audible, and the yes voice screams so loud it could almost be real. My hand finds his curls and oh god, his hair is so soft. He tightens his grip on my waist and the kiss deepens, his teeth grazing softly across my bottom lip. Something stirs inside me, and I think I'm starting to realize, starting to accept that I've been wanting Simon as much more than a friend. The emotions are too intense to deny and shut away, and accepting them a little feels somehow relieving.

When we break apart, Simon's arms still around my waist, I'm honestly a little breathless. Simon looks into my eyes as if trying to search through my mind for what this means. A small smile forms on his lips. "You, uh... Did it again."

I can't help but smile back. "Yeah..." 

He moves his hands from my waist to my hands to hold them. He looks at our interlaced fingers for a moment before meeting my eyes again, looking slightly uncertain. "What does this mean for us?"

I chew my lip, uncertain. But I can't keep denying my feelings. "I'm not sure, but I don't want to forget about it." Saying the next few words is both terrifying and relieving, and I take a deep breath. "I think I like you, Simon... As more than just a friend."

His eyes twinkle and his smile widens a little, partly exposing his sharp canines. I try not to appear as if I'm staring at his mouth and he says, "I... I like you too."

My stomach flutters and I hope desperately that Simon isn't paying attention to the way I'm blushing. "I, uh... Maybe... You... We could... See where this goes? Whatever this is..."

He's smiling ear to ear now and he nods slowly. "Yeah... Sounds good."

I force myself to look away from his mouth and my eyes drift to the window. The sky is nearly cloudless, and thoughts of kissing Simon by the lake drift into my mind without my permission. "Hey, do you want to go out to the lake for a bit?"

Simon looks slightly alarmed and shakes his head quickly, careful to avoid my gaze. "No! Uh, no. I don't really like going outside, it gets so cold this time of year, you know?" He chuckles awkwardly.

Weird... "Okay, yeah... I get your point. We could get the bus to Bjärstad instead? Find a nice café or something?"

He keeps smiling unconvincingly and shakes his head. "Nahh, I don't like cafés. What about your dorm instead?"

I chew my lip. Oh god. "My dorm? Yeah, sounds good... We never did finish that movie."

He chuckles and drops his gaze to our hands for a moment before looking back up at me. "Okay... And I won't run away this time, I promise."

I chuckle, thinking of the last time he was in my dorm. I tug his hand so we're walking towards where the dorms are and he giggles softly. We walk into my dorm and I close the door behind us as Simon sits down on my bed. I grab my laptop and search for the movie, although if it were up to me, we wouldn't be watching a movie at all...

I sit down beside him and put the laptop on the desk so that we can watch it while sitting against the wall. I turn on the movie where we left off but I'm still chewing my lip, not really focusing on the movie. I keep having to push my thoughts away and I'm vaguely aware of Simon's body next to me, his thigh pressed against mine. I want to... No, don't think about that. 

I haven't even noticed that I bit my lip so hard it started bleeding until Simon turns his head sharply and points it out. His pupils are dilated as he stares at my lips. I brush a finger across my bottom lip and Simon's gaze follows my hand. The blood from my lip is on my finger now and I get up to wash my hands in the small en suite. For some reason, Simon follows right behind me without pausing the movie. I don't really know what to do with my lip and just stare at us in the mirror for a moment. Maybe I should kiss him, I'm pretty sure he wants me to... 

His phone rings and his pupils return to normal as he tears his gaze away from my lips and answers his phone. "Hola, mamá."

He talks to his mom and I walk to the laptop to pause the movie. I stand awkwardly with my hands in my pockets, wishing I had taken Spanish lessons. When he hangs up, he turns to me with a slightly disappointed look on his face. "She apparently drove over here to pick me up, so I have to go now."

Oh. I feel a pang of disappointment but I'll probably have plenty more chances to hang out with him. I nod with a small, forced smile. "Hm, okay. I'll see you tomorrow, then."

He nods as well and slowly makes his way towards my door. "Yeah. Tomorrow."

He opens the door and waves at me before stepping into the hallway and closing the door behind him. I let myself fall down on the bed where he sat before and sigh. I would've liked to keep him here a little longer...

Lil note again: I'm really sorry but I probably won't be able to upload daily because some days I literally have 0 time or I'm mentally drained, but I'll keep trying my best to update as often as I can! I hope everyone likes the story <3