A LISTLESS JOURNAL

Nerves?

Sept 4, 2024

I've been trying to find some logic behind all the sufferings of human beings and it didn't age well. I'm convinced that there's literally no fricking reason for all the bullshit happening in this world.  They say

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

I repeat ladies and gentlemen, it's a lie being spread by people who are living their life fullest.  In reality, there's plenty of things that don't kill you yet makes you worse as a human being. Maybe an amputation doesn't kill you but it does take away your normal functioning as a human. And that is not something you'll call being stronger. Most of the motivations and motivational speakers are hypocritical. I don't know how people even listen to them.

The same goes for, "Beauty doesn't matter." It's a seemingly positive message being sold by beautiful and pretty people to  give you the fake hopes. But when you step out in the real world, it's totally different.  It's like,
Oh, you're pretty? Here's a seat on the crowd bus... here's a rich life partner for you... Here's your promotion... Here's your respect... here's your chance in the modelling industry...list goes on. Never let yourself think otherwise. Beauty is an asset and it's okay to accept this fact. The only thing that isn't okay is one harming their own self by obsessing over beauty.

“Is there another life? Shall I awake and find all this a dream? There must be, we cannot be created for this sort of suffering.”

This is a quote by John Keats and I really want to time travel back to his era and meet him just tell him that we're, in fact, born to suffer only. 

"Everything happens for a reason"  but have they told you if it's for a good  reason or a bad one? No.  A bad reason is also a reason. This indicates that one should not live by quotes that are literally just a deception to make them feel better about life that has no means to be happy. I know there would be people who'd question me if it's wrong to be happy and content... I'd say no but the problem is the happiness is worthless if you have no idea of the truth. And the problem about happiness is you'll definitely lose it once you're aware about your surroundings and finally find out the truth of this pathetic life.

I have no idea what I'm talking about, I really got some cruel sorta remarks from both of my parents this morning and it has really built some weird feelings, so I thought it'd be nice to write some stuff here to lessen the weight of not being good enough.

I really want to write the remaining chapters of the novel I'm writing but I've no energy or maybe I'm just lazy. I have the entire storyline ready but I just can't bring myself to write it. Whatever, I know my readers are loyal. Haha...