Semi-Pro (Shota Aizawa X Reader)

Uncertainty

The hospital visit helps raise your spirits a little.  Most of the students are there visiting when you arrive, and it settles your mind to see them unharmed.

Toshinori stops dead in his tracks before he even makes it into Midoryia's room.  You let him take his time, knowing this is hard for him.

"Why don't you take a few minutes- talk to him."  You tell him quietly after walking back to the doorway.  "I'll meet you in the lounge."

There's a small lounge for friends and family on this floor, separate from the general waiting room for privacy and quiet.  You step inside to wait for Toshinori but are shocked to see your ex-co-teacher asleep in one of the upholstered chairs.

The door shuts behind you with a loud click and Aizawa stirs awake suddenly.  You curse under your breath, wondering if it's too late to turn and walk back out.

Aizawa squints at you, and then at the sun streaming in the window.  "What time is it?"  He asks to the room in a gravelly voice.

You don't answer, not at all in the mood for small talk with him.  You bite your lip and stiffly take a seat by the door.

If Aizawa was here all night that must mean he went straight from the police station to the hospital.  From the look of him, he hasn't gotten much sleep. 

"How's your shoulder?"  he asks, and you realize at that moment you've been staring at him.  You clear your throat and turn your head toward the door, not answering.

The hero sighs, and a darkness settles over the room.  You hate it.  It makes you feel nauseous to think of how close you two were just days ago, and now it feels even worse than when you first met.  Back then you were strangers- now the animosity between you stings bitterly.

"You know we're still gonna have to work together this school year."

You roll your eyes.

"It won't make things easier for anyone to ignore each other."

You tighten your fists but stay quiet.

You hear a scoff and shuffling from across the room.  Aizawa stomps right up to your chair.  "Just- talk to me."

Your attention snaps to him finally.  His voice was slightly raised and there was an edge of emotion behind his words- almost like the other night in the woods.  His hands are planted on the armrests, enveloping you. Aizawa holds your gaze and both the intensity from his frustration and your anger warms your blood.

"You're wrong, Eraser Head," you state the words harshly, purposefully using his formal hero title, "we can ignore each other.  You did it to me for weeks when I first got here.  Now is no different."

That's a lie and you know it.  It's all different, because this time your heart aches even as your chest is on fire from your anger. 

You stand up quickly, deciding you can't handle being in here anymore.  Aizawa doesn't back up to make room, so your bodies are a mere centimeter apart, faces so close you're almost touching noses. "So I'm asking- telling you.  Leave me alone."

The door clicks open as Toshinori peeks inside slowly.  "Sorry- am I interrupting something?"

"No."  You follow him out the door with a pointed glare in Aizawa's direction.  "Nothing."

It's a little awkward on your way out to the car, and you wonder if Toshinori will ask you about it.  He definitely heard your raised voice in that room and it would be natural to have questions.

"So..." he begins on your way out of the building.  "Are things okay between you and Eraser Head?"

You sigh.  "No.  I mean, I don't know.  It's complicated."

You slide into the passenger seat of the car, slouching down in defeat.

"I'll drop it if you want," Toshinori offers as he starts the car, "but I'm also here if you want to talk about it."

So far, no one knows about anything that's gone on between the two of you, good or bad.  It would be really nice to tell someone, and you know you can trust Toshinori of all people. 

"I'd like to.  If you're up for a long story."

So you explain everything, from your first week where Aizawa avoided you like the plague to your moment of connection after USJ, your time training together, and even your growing...affection for him, to phrase it carefully.  You leave out the details of the hot springs and other compromising moments, not ready to share that information with anyone, even Toshinori.

The blond hero listens carefully as he drives, nodding along and frowning or gently laughing as you explain the situation.  He sighs when you've finished, and you can't help but laugh at that.  "That's exactly how I've been feeling."

"It sounds like that big fight might have been a miscommunication."  Toshinori says.  "You both had a lot of emotions running through you and couldn't really say what you wanted."

You scoff.  "Trust me, I said plenty.  I don't really see how he could be confused about that."

"You told him you were transferring to another class, another mentor even.  That might have hurt him."

Aizawa?  Hurt by you?  It's not something you had really considered.  "But I told him I put the request in earlier in the semester when he was being a dick.  By the time Nezu told me about it I didn't even want to leave!"

Toshinori glances at you.  "Why did you?"

You hesitate, not sure you're ready to admit your reasoning.  "I hadn't decided one way or the other when I talked to Aizawa.  I wanted to see what he thought about it.  I... I wanted to see if he would ask me to stay.  If he cared."

"And?"

You let out a slow, shaky breath and will yourself not to get emotional.  "He let me go.  Made it clear it didn't matter to him one way or the other."

Toshinori shakes his head.  "Then he's an idiot."

"I'm the idiot."  Your voice almost cracks.  "He never cared and I saw what I wanted to see any ways."

"Well I know that isn't true."

You glance at Toshinori now, confused by that.  "What do you mean?"

He hesitates like he isn't sure how to explain.  "I think it's been clear to most of the staff for a while- especially the ones who live in the quad."

"What is clear, Toshinori?"

He clears his throat.  "Look- I can't speak for Eraser Head, and I don't want to spread gossip.  All I know is that in all my time at UA so far, Aizawa has never spent as much time with anyone, let alone a newcomer, as he has with you.  He's never let anyone else teach with him, and he only trains with others when it's required.  Honestly, when you both started getting back from the training facilities so late every night, most of the faculty just assumed that you guys were... y'know."

The revelations about your supposed significance to the solitary hero and the fact everyone knows but you is stunning.  You clear your froggy throat and sit up a little. 

"At the end of the day it doesn't matter.  He's the most emotionally congested person I've ever met and I can't beg him to tell me how he feels all the time."

"I can't argue with you on that.  My only question is- are you willing to move on from these students over this?"

Toshinori's words hurt but you know he's in earnest.  You sigh, rubbing your forehead.

"I don't want to.  But I also have to be my best self for them, and I don't know if I can do that there anymore."

The uncertainty hurts almost as much as the thought of leaving your class.  Hopefully, it will fade soon and you can focus on starting over with 1-B.