Last Stop: Love

9. Voice of the heart

Meetha's heartbeat raced wildly as she took the first step. One part of her liked this, while the other was screaming its head off internally. She tried to appear confident as she undid her hair.

Irfan sighed deeply when she leaned back and pushed back a few strands that fell on her face.

“Again, you look beautiful, Meetha. Sorry if I'm being too forward.”

“N-no problem, I guess.”

“Would you believe me if I said I never talk like this to any girls?”

“A little hard to believe, Qureshi. That Shah Rukh impression seemed like it was practised at least a hundred times.”

Irfan blushed again and slapped his forehead lightly.
“Aah.. I'm not going to live this one down, am I?”

“Now that's a fact!” She laughed mercilessly.

His chuckle faded as he looked straight at her, “I know it's hard to believe, but this is my first time telling a girl whom I met four hours ago that she looks beautiful. You bring out a side of me that I never knew existed.”

Meetha felt her heart flutter.

His words sounded too sweet to be true. A sceptical part of her heart chided her sternly, not wanting to get hurt again by another smooth-talking man.

He saw her suddenly becoming silent and withdrawn. He doubted if he'd gone a bit far. The rest of the compartment has gone to a peaceful slumber, leaving only the two of them sitting awake in semi-darkness. He couldn't read her expressions that clearly, but understood something was wrong.

He chose to remain quiet, lest he put his foot in his mouth again.

Meetha took a deep breath. “Irfan, you know why I boarded this train, right?”

To die.

He just nodded.

Meetha looked at him with unreadable eyes.
“Can I talk to you about Ajith?”

Irfan had known it was inevitable; she ought to face her feelings. No five-hour talk session is gonna make her forget the reality. At the end of the day, it was her life and hers alone. No amount of motivational speeches would mend a broken heart.

“We can talk as much as you're comfortable with.”

“I have liked him since childhood. We were neighbours and good friends, but I wanted more. I wanted to be close to him. I struggled to express my feelings, so I would simply steal glances at him every chance I got. I never thought he'd notice, so imagine my excitement when he starts to reciprocate my feelings. Three years ago, when he got his job and I was about to finish college, he proposed. It was a dream come true. Ever since then, my entire life has been about him. I pictured us building our life together – a cozy home, a loving marriage. Today marks ten years of us knowing each other, so I wanted to surprise him at his office. When I went there.. There.. He was.. he..”

She swallowed her tears vehemently. Words stuttered as she closed her eyes in anguish.

Irfan could guess what would have happened. He clenched his fists tightly. He couldn't bear to see her in pain.

“Meetha, it's okay. I get it. You don't have to reminisce about that.”

She sniffled and coughed. She took a sip from her water bottle.

“He was holding a woman's hand, telling that he only cared about her and no one else.” She finished in a throaty voice.

Irfan's eyes blazed with anger.
“Well, he is a frigging idiot. I don't know why anyone would do such a disgusting thing.”

Meetha shrugged. “I've known him for ten years, and been his girlfriend for three. Never once have I doubted him. Even when my friends tried to warn me, I dismissed them haughtily. I feel like I'm responsible for this mess.”

“Never say that. Cheating happens due to cheaters. Ajith is a stupid, stupid man who couldn't appreciate the gift he'd been given. It's not your fault he's unfaithful.”

Meetha was lost in thoughts for a moment.
“Have you ever been in a long-term relationship, Irfan?”

He shook his head. “Nope. I have had several crushes, gone on dates, but not one serious relationship till date.”

“It takes effort, along with a lot of love and compromise to build a relationship. I worked so hard on our relationship to build our future. When I put my heart and soul into it, only to learn that he had just been using me, is It wrong of me to feel like I want to die?”

“No. As I said, your feelings are legitimate. But he's not worth it. Meetha, your life is far more precious than one senseless, cheating lowlife. Make him regret what he did to you. Or better, make him regret being born.”

Irfan's words were laced with unadulterated fury. The determination in his voice was solid.

He leaned forward and touched her hand. “Please don't think of dying, Meetha.”

“Irfan, I..”

“I see you and I see a wonderful girl on the threshold of life, full of potential, and hungry for achievement. You deserve all the love in the world. You need to experience all the happiness the world has to offer.”

She didn't try to stop the tears flowing down her cheeks as she looked into his eyes.

“I don't want to die anymore, Irfan.”

His face lit up like a thousand fireworks at her words. Eyes welling up with tears to the brim, he breathed a sigh of relief so audible it was heard above the train's thud.

With an awkward kneel on the berth, Irfan moved near her and leaned in as she watched bewildered, and quickly pulled her into a tight hug. She was unsure of what to feel, and he seemed too ecstatic to care. His breathing was rampant and heavy as he rested his head on her shoulder. 

“Can you please say that again, Meetha?”

Meetha smiled with tears. Nestled safely in his embrace, she whispered with determination.

“I don't want to die anymore. I wanna live.”

***