Collateral Damage (DeadpoolxOC)

XV - Pillow Talks

And the coaster he used.

Wade curled around Kate, bodies still tangled in that perfect post-fight, post-sex haze. His arm draped over her, pulling her closer, the two of them fitting together like two weapons in a holster. He loved the warmth, her scent, the way their breathing synced up—hell, even the fact that he was still inside her felt oddly... intimate, but in that totally non-cheesy, Deadpool way. Everything was perfect.

But, like always, something crept up.

And this time? It wasn't another bounty hunter, assassin, or T-Ray's smug face lurking in the shadows. No, it was something much scarier.

The other coaster.

"Uh, Kate... babe... there's something that's kinda bugging me," Wade mumbled, breaking the silence, his hand lazily tracing shapes on her skin.

Kate didn't even open her eyes, clearly used to Wade's random post-sex musings. "Let me guess, the new Wolverine movie ruined your day?"

Wade chuckled. "Well, like always, but no... It's just... we didn't exactly play it safe back there."

She opened her eyes, barely giving him a glance. "Wade. I have a coil."

Wade blinked. "A coil? What, like some hidden superpower? 'Cause the only coil I'm familiar with is recoil—you know, like from a Barrett M82A1 or the F2. You should've mentioned this!"

She rolled her eyes. "It's an IUD, Wade. You think I'd rely on you to handle protection? Please. If I left it up to you, we'd be living on some Amish farm by now, surrounded by a dozen screaming little Wilsons in straw hats."

Wade grinned. "Amish, huh? Well, I'd rock a beard. Plus, who wouldn't want a Deadpool barn-raising event? I'd be the life of the buggy—handing out katanas instead of nails. Hell, I'd be the best buggy driver around."

Kate let out a laugh, but then her expression shifted, growing more serious. 

She looked away for a moment before meeting his eyes again. Her voice softened. "Should I... should I take it out? The IUD, I mean."

Well, well, well, looks like we're at the 'So, when's the baby coming?' stage of this saga. Hey, author-lady, you planning on flooding the basement soon, or are we keeping things dry for a bit longer?

Wade blinked, caught off guard. For once, he was speechless. 

"I mean," he started, rubbing the back of his neck, "it's not like I didn't see this coming... eventually. But, uh, you were telling me earlier how scared you are. Maybe not the best time to bring a ticking time bomb into the mix, unless, y'know... you're hearing that biological clock ticking like one of those countdowns from Ajax."

Kate shifted, turning toward him so they were lying face to face. She remained silent, just watching him. The weight of the question settled over them both.

Wade broke the silence, his voice quieter, more serious than usual. "Besides, I already suck at this parenting gig. But, to be fair, I may have used my baby girl as bait only once. Twice maybe. That's just practical thinking. Who better to outwit U.L.T.I.M.A.T.U.M. or Madcap? Oh, who am I lying to? I'm pretty much the worst parenting example since Darth Vader."

She sighed. "I'm not saying now... but someday. I just want to know if you'd be there. Not run away."

"You serious about this?" Wade asked, voice lower now. "What if this tiny version of me turns out to be a total psycho? Think about the property damage. I mean, they'd inherit the crazy... plus the bad jokes. God help us all."

Kate's lips curved into a faint smile. "Maybe. But if they've got the best parts of you, I think I could handle it."

Wade, trying to dodge the seriousness of it all, quipped, "Hey, didn't you just roast me earlier? Now you're all, 'let's make tiny Deadpools.' What's changed? You've gotta admit I've got some redeeming qualities, right? Like loyalty, perseverance, and..." He trailed off, his brain hiccuping as it scrambled for more examples.