AMOR FATI (Love of fate)

Chapter 2 There's a Difference

                           I found myself lost in thought, reflecting on the events of the day. My mind wandered from the morning encounter with Chris and the unfamiliar woman to seeing her again at the office. And yes, at the house. Every morning for breakfast and every evening for dinner, I joined the Stewards family. I had refused when Uncle Michael first asked me to stay with them. He had already done so much—taking care of me and giving me a job. I didn't want to burden him further. But I couldn't refuse again when he invited me for meals. It was only thirty minutes to an hour, and I could spend some time with family. After my parents passed, they became my everything.

Somehow, I managed to get through the first half of my day, completing my tasks as best as I could. Feeling the need for a break, I headed off to grab lunch with Lisa. She's the most cheerful and energetic person I've ever met, always so full of life.

The moment she saw me approaching her desk, she squinted playfully and asked, "Why are you so early for lunch today?" Before I could answer, she followed up with a more serious question, her eyes studying my face, "And why do you look so down?"

Oh, how well she knows me. Lisa can read me like an open book. She already knew I had feelings for Chris and was well aware of the complex relationship I had with the Stewards family. It was as if she could sense everything I was trying to hide.

I gently took her hand and told her I would share everything I had been through since the morning. As we neared the cafeteria, the air was buzzing with noise and excitement, much like earlier in the day. Once again, the cause of the commotion was the unfamiliar face in the crowd. In the morning, I had restrained myself from asking anyone about it, knowing my place and choosing to hold back. But the mystery gnawed at me all day, refusing to leave my thoughts. Unable to keep it to myself any longer, I poured out the entire story to Lisa. And there she was, laughing uncontrollably at my confusion.

After her fit of laughter subsided, Lisa assured me that she would find out more about the mysterious girl and let me know everything. Her promise gave me a glimmer of hope that, by the end of the day, I would finally have some answers. Immersed in my work, the hours slipped by, and before I knew it, the clock struck five. I quickly packed my things and made a beeline for Lisa's desk, my curiosity about the girl growing with every step. A passing thought struck me then: if Chris had been close enough to introduce her when we saw them together earlier, I wouldn't have needed to rely on Lisa to find out who she was.

Lisa, with her usual curiosity and sharp instincts, had begun her investigation into the mysterious girl who had captured everyone's attention. After a bit of digging, she uncovered a few details that immediately piqued my interest. The girl's name was Anastasia June, though she was often called Ana or simply June by those who knew her well. What struck me even more was that she wasn't just anyone—she was the daughter of Eoin and Grace June, a couple renowned for their thriving business empire in the worlds of fashion and Jewelry. Their influence in the industry had made them household names.

But it wasn't just her family's prominence that caught me off guard. There was an unexpected and rather shocking revelation: Anastasia had once been Chris's junior during their college days. Not only had they shared the same campus, but they had also crossed paths in several classes and even participated in the same extracurricular clubs. They had spent time under the same roof, in more ways than one. The thought that their lives had intertwined like this, and that Chris had never mentioned her before in front of anyone in past, left me both puzzled and intrigued.

As I stood there, trying to process it all, my thoughts began to spiral. Was it mere coincidence that their paths had crossed so many times, or was there more to the story? The deeper I thought, the clearer it became. Despite my growing feelings for Chris, I realized that I was just a friend's daughter, an outsider in comparison to the history he and Anastasia shared. The bond between them, however distant it might have seemed now, felt almost unbreakable in my mind.

A soft, almost inaudible voice deep within me began to whisper, suggesting that perhaps I was holding on to something I was never meant to possess. As I watched them, the way their lives seemed so effortlessly woven together, doubt crept in. The way he reacted to her presence—so natural, so easy—stirred something unsettling within me. There was that brief, tender smile he reserved just for her, the kind that spoke of a shared history I could never touch. And then, when she stumbled on the staircase, he instinctively reached out to catch her, his hand closing around hers with such gentle care, as if he had done it a thousand times before.

In that moment, I couldn't help but wonder if I had been blind all along. Maybe what I thought could be mine was always meant to belong to someone else. I felt the weight of realization settle over me like a slow, inevitable tide—perhaps it was time to release the idea of Chris, to let go of the hopes I had woven around him. As much as I had tried to convince myself otherwise, the truth was quietly, painfully clear. Some things, some people, are simply not ours to hold.

As the night slowly descended, I remained inside the apartment, my mind tangled in thoughts of what lay ahead for me. The weight of uncertainty pressed down, and I found myself pacing, replaying every possible scenario in my head, trying to make sense of my next steps. I knew I couldn't face questions from Uncle about joining for dinner, so when he asked about my plans, I lied. I told him I was heading out with Lisa to enjoy a pleasant evening, assuring him I'd be careful. He seemed relieved, perhaps even a little proud that I was finally taking a break from my worries.

But instead of going anywhere, I stayed in my room. The truth was, I couldn't bear the idea of socializing or pretending that everything was fine. The quiet of the apartment felt safer than the world outside, where expectations and uncertainties loomed. I sat there, wrapped in my own thoughts, hoping that by the end of the night, clarity might come—yet knowing deep down, it likely wouldn't.

                                                     In the quiet shadows of the night,

                                           Dreams weave through doubts, taking flight.

                                                     A whispered lie to ease the pain,

                                                     Yet in stillness, truth will remain.