AMOR FATI (Love of fate)

Chapter 4 Is It Love?

Since childhood, my life has centered on understanding and mastering power. I learned not only to hold onto power but also to wield it wisely when necessary to maintain control. Over time, I realized that true power isn't just about strength or dominance but about balance, adaptability, and wisdom. The ability to navigate life's complexities while staying in control became my ultimate goal. My journey has been a continuous lesson in knowing when to act decisively and when to exercise restraint, ensuring that I remain the one shaping my own destiny.

The Stewards Company commanded respect and fear, with few daring to challenge us directly. Most sought friendship or fair competition, recognizing the strength of aligning with us. However, beneath the surface, a few attempted to undermine us, though we remained vigilant, always ready to protect our dominance and ensure those who opposed us faced the consequences.

I never really had the chance to date anyone. The Stewards Company has always been my top priority, taking up most of my time and focus. My parents tried to set me up on a few blind dates here and there, but I just couldn't bring myself to be interested in any of them. Nothing ever clicked. Recently, though, they've brought up the topic of marriage, and now they're suggesting I get married to Anna and start a family.

I never liked Anna and, for reasons I couldn't fully explain, I even hated her. Just being around her irritated me. But I had no choice-I had to see her every morning and night during breakfast and dinner. At work, I'd run into her too because of our jobs, and it felt like she was always watching me, both at home and at the office. The only reason she had a place in our house was because her parents had saved my parents' lives. But no matter what, she could never have a place in my heart. I resented her, maybe because my parents seemed to care for her a little more than they cared for me. When they suggested marriage, I immediately refused and made it clear I had no interest in Anna.

My parents constantly nagging me about getting married was really getting on my nerves. Around the same time, my friend June returned from abroad after successfully launching her clothing line in Paris. I've always admired how she handles herself in the business world. She's growing more powerful with each passing day, and I can't help but respect the way she manages her image so gracefully. What I admire most about her is how she stays beautiful both inside and out, no matter how much success she achieves.

June's presence in my life brought some noticeable changes, both in how I felt personally and in the way my parents stopped nagging me as much. She brought a sense of relief, like a new chapter had begun. However, despite these changes, the constant feeling of Anna's eyes on me never went away. No matter where I was or what I was doing, it always seemed like she was silently watching, and that uneasy feeling never faded. It was obvious that she had feelings for me. I could see it in the way she looked at me-those lingering glances that spoke louder than words. She tried to get my attention in subtle ways, always going out of her way to impress me, whether through her work at the office or the small gestures she made at home. But instead of appreciating her efforts, I found myself irritated by them. Everything she did, no matter how well-intentioned, only fuelled my annoyance. Her attempts, no matter how sincere, seemed to have the opposite effect, leaving me feeling nothing but disdain.

I desperately needed a break from work, the constant pressure weighing me down, and the idea of escaping to a beach retreat sounded like the perfect solution. I decided to plan a short getaway, just two days and one night, but it felt like exactly what I needed to recharge. When I floated the idea to my friends, they were immediately on board-June, Alex and his girlfriend, and Ronan with his wife all agreed to join me.

The moment June confirmed she'd be coming along, I felt a surge of happiness. Having her there meant more than just the company; her presence brought a sense of calm and excitement that I hadn't realized I was craving. Though it was just a brief trip, I knew this small escape would be the perfect way to unwind, clear my head, and enjoy the company of those closest to me. The thought of the ocean waves, the sun, and a carefree weekend surrounded by friends had already started to lift the weight off my shoulders.

We had an incredible time on the private island just off the coast of the UK. Each day was a perfect mix of activities-there were moments spent with the whole group, peaceful times alone, and romantic evenings just for couples. Everything about the experience was magical. The sunrises painted the sky with beautiful colors, and the sunsets felt almost surreal, as if we were living in a dream.

But the best part of the trip was the unspoken agreement between June and me to start dating. It felt like a significant shift in our relationship, a silent understanding that brought us closer together. We didn't need to say much; the connection was palpable, and in that idyllic setting, we both felt ready to embrace this new chapter in our lives.

When I returned from my holiday, life seemed to be exactly as I had left it, but I felt a newfound sense of calm and happiness. I was able to spend quality time with my parents and June, enjoying moments that felt more meaningful than before. Even though there were many challenges at the company waiting for me, I felt confident in my ability to manage everything.

During this time, I shared my idea of launching a new clothing line within the Stewards company. This was a project I had been mulling over, and June played a significant role in bringing it to life. Her encouragement and guidance helped boost my confidence in taking on this new venture. I felt excited about the prospect of merging my vision with the legacy of the Stewards, and I was ready to take the next steps with a renewed sense of purpose.

Amid all the changes happening around me, one noticeable difference stood out: Ana. Ever since I returned from my holiday, I hadn't seen her at all. She hadn't crossed my path at work or anywhere else associated with the company. The last time I laid eyes on her was the day June came to our home, both during the visit and at the office.

At first, I thought it was just a single day that she had missed. But as time went on, it became clear that she hadn't been around since the day I left for my short trip. Strangely, this absence brought me a sense of relief. My parents focused their full attention on me, and the quiet atmosphere without her presence felt almost peaceful. I found myself appreciating the newfound freedom, enjoying the moment without the tension that Ana always seemed to bring into my life.

Though time may mend the deepest scars,

The echoes of that day remain,

Forever etched within my heart,

A bittersweet reminder of the pain.