The more I spoke to this woman, the safer I felt. It turns out she has fostered children in the past who have now grown up and left apart from 1 who is called Nat, shirt for Natalie. She is only 8 years old so there was a while until she was leaving. It turns out this woman actually wants to help me. Even after I told her everything. Well maybe not everything but quite a lot. It also turns out she owns a small B&B on the corner and she was prepared to give me a basic room for a couple of nights while I calm down and decide what's going to happen next. This may all seem untrue but it's not. She showed me a room. And I placed down the small bag I had bought with me. Nat had come up to. The woman was about to leave.
"I want to talk to Phil" nat said.
"No come on in sure the poor boy needs a while to himself" she replied.
"It's fine I don't mind" I told her. The woman left and nat stayed sat at a chair in the corner. We were speaking for a while. She wanted to know about what it was like to be a run away.
I woke up the next morning to the sound of sea gulls. I had a shower because I still felt dirty from sleeping in the mood and I changed into the 1 clean outfit I bought. I hand washed my other clothes in the sink and went out for a walk. I found a library so I just went strolling in. Over in the corner I saw a row of computers. One thought came to my mind. Shall I? I suppose I could just quickly reassure my mom in fine then log out. Nothing else. Nothing else. Nothing else. I continuously told myself.
I logged onto Facebook. 47 messages. 20 from my mom. 20 from Dan?! Why was Dan messaging me. He's not meant to care! Stop. This isn't how it's meant to work. This isn't the plan... And 7 from josh.
I lost my control of my own hand and of course I ended up on Josh's messages. No. I must cry. I'm in a public library. I looked at my moms messages instead. It was all asking where I was then the one message that caught my attention,
Mom: I've called the police. Wherever you are it's going to be ok babe xxxx
No. I want to stay out here alone with no one back home giving any cares about my disappearance. Maybe have a party then forget about my existence. What are you even thinking. Like someone would pay actually money for something about you. Like I said, they don't care. Messages from Dan was him saying he was worried and I needed to come back. STOP. You can't be worried about me. This isn't working. I want to take myself back to philtopia or whatever it was called again. Just a world with me. Not even Dan this time. Just me. To be alone. Just me.
YOU ARE READING
Too worthless to fall in love (Phan)
FanficPhil has been bullied his whole life and when he moved to a new school nothing changes. As people say, same old same old. But at his new school has he felt the saviour he only finds in his dreams or in his nightmares.
